Stupid Phone. Stupid People.

I've been writing for a while, and the phone keeps ringing and distracting me. But now it's dead, so I should have some peace. For a little while.

Got blood drawn after my job interview (which went pretty well, but not great; I kind of think I made a faux pas by admitting I fucked up my schedule last December at the old B&N. Damn me and my honesty.) More specifically, got blood drawn in a lab in the back of a Duane Reade. Also had to carry my own urine through Duane Reade, which was an unusual experience.

And that's all. I feel totally wiped out (they drew a SHITLOAD of blood), so I decided to rewrite the first chapter in a new, pretty composition book purchased solely for that purpose. I'm not done, and the new draft is already 11 pages. So huzzah for my new composition book.

I also tentatively titled the book, TROUBLESOME TRANSITIONS. I don't like it, but I felt the need to call it SOMETHING besides 'Death and Serial Killer Story.' It's based on a quote by ISAAC ASIMOV: 'Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome.'

Although in my story, none of that is true. Life is stressful. Death is exhausting, and the transition is the easiest part of the whole deal. But I love that quote. And my book needed a temporary title. So that's that.

I'm volunteering on Wednesday and Thursday for my friend's theater company, so I need to get a lot of writing done today and tomorrow. Because I want to keep this book going. Also, I decided not to cut my hair until it's done BEFORE I read that NEIL GAIMAN said the same thing when writing AMERICAN GODS. The difference is that I'm a girl so it's not a big deal, I can save my money to get it cut at a nice place, and I wanted to grow my hair out anyway.

But I SWEAR I got the idea before I knew he did it. We should just be best friends because of coincidences like these. I'm kidding, FYI.

Now all of you: scurry off and I'll get back to writing. Deal? Deal.
- LV

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Money Is Best Spent On Books

Which is why I never have any money. But that may change, as I have a job interview tomorrow at Barnes & Noble (a different one from the last one, obviously.) It's tedious, mind-numbing soul-crushing idiot work, but it will give me money, and benefits, and it will keep me busy and surrounded by books, and I DO get a meager discount. It should tide me over until I get my dreamed-of job as an editorial assistant (my REAL dream job, as a writer, is still just a dream.

Haven't heard back on my short story submission (I keep promising to send it to people, then chickening out because I worry it isn't that good, and rejection by strangers is much easier to deal with than by those I love and respect.) And I know that I said I would post some writing. And I will. I just don't know WHAT to post. I could post an article, a paper for school, a short story, a poem, or an excerpt from a longer piece. It's really hard to decide. I also don't want to be told I'm a bad writer on my own blog, because that would be kind of tragic on a massive scale. But I promise, as soon as I figure out what to post, it shall be posted. Some time this week. Honest.

My outline for my novel, which is having a hard time deciding how funny vs. morbid it wants to be, is getting pretty damn long (six pages at this count, on the computer, and estimated nearly thirty chapters, although I need to add some stuff to it or other bits won't make sense). I've decided to write the actual story in notebooks, because it's hard for me to write creatively on the laptop (I spend way too much time editing typos).

I just worry my story is WAY too much like other authors, although I've never heard of an idea like this. I'm not even sure how good it is. The idea, I mean. I haven't written the story yet, so who knows if that will be good. But I already feel very fond of the characters, which I consider a good start. Especially David, who gets the short stick and poor Thanatos, who may be the nicest evil demon out there.

Anyone know any good books/websites on old gods and magic? This story has gotten way more fantastical since its original conception (I originally envisioned it as a dark, sad short story. Now it's a full-length book with a heavy dose of humor and the ridiculous).

Incidentally, can a book that involves serial killers, Death himself, and the demise of a major character still be funny? And can it still say something (about life, and the afterlife, and finding a meaning in your world) while making you laugh?

I'm just worried I won't do the story justice, that I'll chicken out on the darker stuff and make it ridiculous, or become ponderous and Deep when I should be poking fun at what I'm talking about.

It's an issue. I'll figure it out.

Anyway. Going to a reading of a friend's play tonight with people. Went to the gym earlier and took out my frustrations on a punching bag. It's been a fairly nice day.
- LV

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All Hail Spider Jerusalem, President of My Attack Ovaries

A Brief Look At ElleVee's Week:

• Distribute roughly 1,000 books throughout the office.
• Check the contact information for over 600 independent bookstores
• Read 175-page manuscript and write reader's report
• Read and edit 251-page manuscript and write reader's report
• Handle slush (need I say more?)
• Have meeting with president of imprint to discuss Dean Koontz project
• Write flap copy for children's book (and edit it)
• Attend meeting on OTHER manuscript to determine if it goes to publishers.
• Have ANOTHER meeting with president of imprint to determine whether or not to purchase entirely different manuscript, which I just finished commenting on.

People keep giving me manuscripts to read. Which is a nice change from reading slush (one being written by published or soon-to-be-published authors, the other being written by the same people who flash you on the subway). But it's a lot of pressure.

I have decided that this is punishment for last week. The Gods of Publishing saw me sitting at my desk, whining about slush, playing around on LibraryThing.com and Amazon.com, and judged me unworthy. I have sinned, and this is my penance. Stupid Gods of Publishing.

I'll keep you updated on these projects as they occur. All I can say so far is that nobody needs to worry about Barnes & Noble or Borders taking over the bookstore market. In fact, maybe they should buy a few more bookstores. CRUSH THE LITTLE GUY! CONFORM!

I can't decide if I should go to the Strand today or not. Because, you know, I have so much free time. So, so much free time.

In other news, Warren Ellis is now the God of My Brain. Hurrah to him, and may he be a benevolent god.

For some reason the evil 'Title' part of this page is not obeying me, so here is the title I intended for this post:

"All Hail Spider Jerusalem, President of My Attack Ovaries."

Yeah. Think about it. DID I JUST BLOW YOUR MIND?! Read Transmetropolitan, and all will make sense. In your ENTIRE LIFE. I need to go home.

EDIT: Now the title is where it belongs. The world is where it should be. Sort of.

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