First off, I must freely admit to loving John Krasinski more than I do the average star. Take your Depps and your Pitts and your almost everyone elses, and I will take me some John K. In fact, were it not for the fact that it’s Krasinski who’s legally married, he would trump Ashton Kutcher for me in a heartbeat.
And I love, LOVE Emily Blunt. Because she says she can’t talk about process, because it’s “wanky,” because she acted circles around Anne Hathaway and was somehow kind about it, because, to me, she is the anti-Natalie Portman. She’s a great actress without TELLING everyone she’s a great actress, and that is an achievement.
Now include the obligatory paragraph about how absolutely beautiful they both are, and how very much we like them in pretty, pretty evening clothing…
And I have gotten NOTHING. Nothing. Not one iota of what it’s like to be married to him, nothing about who travels where when someone has a project, nothing about what his mother said when his son married a Brit – barely even a photo (hilariously, if you google them, there is a wedding pic from The Office with Emily Blunt’s face badly Photoshopped over Jenna Fischer’s). I know they’ve been busy, so maybe they decided to take this year for themselves.
Somehow, from these two, I want more. I want the Original EmSki home tour and a long sitdown with Barbra Walters. Is that too much to ask Emily and John Krasinski?
Or am I the one who’s in the wrong here? I love the couple for not being media whores and not shoving themselves and their relationships in our faces (Kardashians anyone?). I mean guys, this is reason why Rachel McAdams is so awesome – she runs around Toronto on the SUBWAY. But seriously, I want John and Emily to kiss eachother to let us know that their romance actually exists and not disappears like Scarlett Johannson's and Ryan Renolds'.
Blog Kinky! And I think illegal, at least in a few states. Title is from Six Feet Under.
* Happy New Year! I hope that 2010 finds you with rocket lasers, and robot sex slaves, and flying rocket boots of sex. Or whatever.
* I KNEW I forgot someone awesome yesterday, and I am bereft, and hang my head in shame. To make up for my hideous oversight, please go read Marvel Smart Ass, who is brilliant and snarky and a gentleman and a scholar.
Food!Win * Let's start 2010 off with a deep-fried caloric ORGY, shall we? [Found at This Is Why You're Fat] Hot apple-bacon turnovers with icing? YES, please. Although rumor has it that bologna is the new bacon, and that soon bacon will be our PARENT'S meat product, man.
I love bologna sandwiches. Bologna with American cheese, lettuce, tomato, on rye bread. Get me one.
Girly!Want * In 2010, I would like this jacket: [Found at Haute Macabre] Only the chances of me wearing it in a field of wheat sans pants is rather unlikely. That's not really how I roll.
Whut? * My hatred of raisins is well-known in my social circle. I hate them. I despise them. They are the fruit of SATAN. But even if I loved raisins in all their shriveled glory, I still think I'd be scared of the Sun-Maid Girl:
This may be scarier than The Ring. This is the face you see before you die. AND YOU THOUGHT RAISINS WEREN'T EVIL. BAH.
Fandom * I can't decide if this is awesome or terrible, and finally I decided it was awesome, because My Little Pony plus Star Wars equals the best babysitting time ever: [Found at Unique Daily]
Star Trek * In 2010, the Oscars will be ruled by GEEKS, HAHHA! And Star Trek will win every Oscar ever, and Chris Pine will celebrate by taking off his clothes, and.... what are we talking about? Who are you people, again?
Art * I love this Venn Diagram of Art and Science, because it is TRUE and WISE, and also the accompanying article is true, wise, and funny. [Found at Ariana Osborne] The best art has elements of science, and the best science has hints of art in it. THEY ARE THE SAME. Except I'm not afraid of art.
Daily Hot Guy [John Krasinski. In a suit. Happy New Year, indeed. Requested by Kristamaru, zombie fighter and general badass.]
WTF, INTERNET? * Now you too can grow herbs out of the President's skull: [Found at Amazon] Really, this just... I do not get it. Why would I want to grow plants out of a President's head? I've never gotten the who Chia Pet thing with humans. I mean, am I weird? Is it abnormal to have no desire to plant things in the head of the Chief of Staff? Should I seek counseling?
The thing that really gets me, however, is the two faces of Obama. You can either have a Happy Plant President, or a Determined Plant President. THEY HAVE DIFFERENT EXPRESSIONS.
I like to imagine Happy Plant President has just experienced a refreshing summer rain, while Determined Plant President is staring down a lawnmower.
Last question: Was there a George W. Bush Chia Pet? Because his last name makes for some hilarious marketing possibilities. Just saying.
Music * I listen to the music Warren Ellis tells me to listen to, because he is somewhat scary and has no problem beating people with chair legs of truth, and I am small and do not want to be beaten with furniture. And Surf Solar is quite good, actually.
I am saying this of my own free will.
Comics * Remember when Jhonen Vasquez was awesome, and had made Squee! And Johnny the Homicidal Maniac and Filler Bunny and Invader Zim, and we all loved him and his weird?
Then he sort of went bad-insane, and made Jellyfist, and went away because he was being hunted by the assassins from Nickelodeon for making the Invader Zim comic finale entirely about space piggies?
Politics * Let me make this as simple and inoffensive as I can: - Conservatives: If you want to convert liberals, fine, but please do not mention 'Convert-A-Liberal Day,' as it immediately invalidates ALL your arguments. - Liberals: If a conservative wants to convert you, politely listen to their arguments, as they may have some good points. And if they mention 'Convert-A-Liberal Day,' you have the legal right to laugh and mention Tea-Bagging. Fair? I think so.
Epic!Fail * I'm going to let this article speak for itself, because honestly, TASING CHILDREN IS ONLY FUNNY IF YOU ARE NOT A POLICE OFFICER:
And I want to sue The Jetsons for lying to me. I do not have Rosie the Robot to clean up after me. THAT IS UNFAIR.
Oh, and for those of you paying attention, I've joined NaBloPoMo, which means I'm going to blog every day without fail, NO MATTER WHAT. Except zombie apocalypse (although can you IMAGINE the entry?) Join the site to keep track, send out links, whatever. SUPPORT FEAR AND LOATHING IN 2010.
* Yet another gif of WIN: See? Maniac Cop 3 was better than The Zoo Gang. TRUFAX.
* Here's another. Strut your shit, Mr. Haley.
TeeVee * I may have a girl crush on Morena Baccarin from Firefly and V. Because she's fucking awesome, and V is going to be epic. [Found at Visitor Site] She's just cool, and knows all my favorite actors, and is going to be a scary alien. Scary AWESOME.
Geek Want * I want this, but I will not hit him: [Found at Geekologie] It's Wall-E! You don't HIT Wall-E. You hold him and love him and comfort him, and let him play with small objects that fascinate him. You don't beat him to death for sugared snacks. I'll protect this Wall-E pinata with my LIFE, you hear?!
Movie!Win * You people can naysay all you want, but Green Hornet is going to be awesome, and Seth Rogen is awesome, and Nicolas Cage is no longer involved, and sometimes that is all you need.
Daily Hot Guy [John Krasinski, AKA Jim from The Office who is a great tall bastard of a man, and has the BEST reaction faces in the history of television, possibly, although I'd still pick Rainn Wilson over him because I have PROBLEMS, but Jim is sort of glorious and sexy, and maybe I will be joining Team Jim. Why does he look so good in a scarf, man? Requested by Kristamaru, who should draw me a picture of Jim. Because.
