In Mexico, You Know What They Call Twinkies? 'Los Submarinos.'

Blog
* Fuck, man, let's go to Mexico! Title is from Zombieland.

* Miss Banshee has started making motivational posters, which only increases her already dizzying level of win:

Seriously, she should adopt me, and raise me as her own.

* Theresa learns me some comics, this time Astro City. Her brain has powers. AMAZING powers. Honestly, if you want a guide to comics, there's no better place to turn.

* I'll feed the plants. I'll feed them people I dislike!

[Drawn by Erin]
Does that require getting close to them? Because that could be a problem.

* It's all Patience's fault that I like memes. And knitting. I think I can blame her for most of the cool things I like. Also, I owe her a zombie hand turkey. It makes sense to ME.

Glee
* NOOOAAAAGGGGHHHHHH, etc. They are pulling the Glee cast from the Macy's parade. Why would they do that? There's no reason for such CRUELTY. I am devastated now. I mean, the parade has become a pile of suck. It's really not very good anymore. And Glee is pure, unadulterated glory. Seriously, it can do no wrong. Have you SEEN the show? There is life before Glee and after Glee, and after is infinitely better.

Doctor Who
* The only thing maybe better than Jude Law's Hamlet? David Tennant's Hamlet, in large part because A) He is Scottish, and B) He is the goddamn DOCTOR. He will wreck you with his powers. And David Tennant's Hamlet is airing on Christmas Day. Of course, this in no way guarantees that those of us trapped in the U.S. Yet ANOTHER reason I should move to England. Someone buy me a ticket.

Fandom
* As I always say, I am not a Star Wars fan:

[Found at The World's Best Ever]
But I think I could get behind Kitty Wars.

People I Love
* In honor of John Hughe's passing, this dude recreated the entire day from Ferris Bueller's Day Off. Which is the best sick day movie, ever, you know. And there's an itinerary, and I wish I had been there, and I love you, Dude From Chicago, because really, this is a totally epic way to spend a day of your life. You are my hero.

Stuff To Live
* I write this blog in the morning, usually. If it's a good day, I have caffeine coursing through my veins, and can tolerate humanity, to some extent. On bad days, I want to level the city with my cranky. So this is the greatest invention I have ever seen:

[Found at Neatorama]
Of course, this would not be a good invention for anyone around me, unless they were constantly filling the FistiCup with coffee. And then when I finish the coffee, I pound people in the face with it!

I'm joking, obviously. The morning is no time for extreme violence. You need a good solid lunch before you can get your rage on.

Daily Hot Guy

[Jackie Earle Haley as Guererro in Human Target, rocking both the kickasstic glasses and the 'stache.]

Writing
* Could someone loan me $2,000 so I can get tutored by Nalo Hopkinson, a writer I dearly love and admire? She needs money, and I need a mentor, because frankly my writing may be pretty good, but I'd like to reduce the amount of hysterical flailing and procrastinating that occurs during each project. Seriously, someone needs to boss me around with my writing. And Ms. Hopkinson has some health problems, so you'd be doing us both a favor. More me than her - she's already a wonderful, successful author. I just spilled lukewarm coffee on the table.

Movie!Fail
* Oh, Roger Avary. I love you by proxy, because you have been touched by the genius of Quentin Tarantino. Even though you sometimes do awful things that make me sad, like drive drunk, or or make Silent Hill movies. Please don't do these things to me. I am worried enough about Quentin, and what he's wearing, and the life choices he seems to be making, and I don't have time to be concerned about you making a sequel to Silent Hill, which was a terrible, awful movie. And the video game is scary enough. Have you ever played it? It makes me want to cry, and lock myself in a well-lit room with a baseball bat.

By the way, what the hell happened to Quentin Tarantino's Half-Life movie? Did we all forget about that?

TeeVee
* I love Burn Notice. As do all mortals, because Bruce Campbell floats down on a cloud made of Kingliness and drives a sexy car and sometimes pretends to be a crooked cop, which made me cheer, maybe, because it's Bruce Campbell. But we do have to give some credit to the writers, who wrote the character of Sam, thus providing us with Bruce Campbell in Hawaiian shirts. I'm sorry, I was busy hailing to the King, baby.

Anyway, the creator of Burn Notice, Matt Nix, is going to make another TV show, and I think we all need to watch it and support it and make it a huge hit, lest we incur the chinny wrath of Bruce Campbell. How would he know, you ask? Oh, you naive fool. Bruce Campbell knows all. Didn't you SEE Bubba Ho-Tep?

Plus, Mr. Nix's show is going to be on FOX, and I STILL don't trust them. I REMEMBER ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT AND FIREFLY.

Geek Want
* I'm not a big gamer (my gaming career started with Echo: The Dolphin and Sonic: The Hedgehog, and ended with Mortal Kombat: Trilogy, although I did play some of the Grand Theft Auto games because I simply didn't believe there was a game where the goal was to screw hookers), but I do love Assassin's Creed. Oh, I never beat it. I didn't even try. I simply got to a middle level, and set about slaughtering everyone in my path, then sneaking off like a NINJA. It's good stress relief. I don't even know the goal of the game, unless it's to kill EVERYONE in the marketplace, in which case I totally won.
I think that you should get one of these if you beat the game:

[Found at Like Cool]
I'd most likely fall on it, because I am clumsy and not an assassin, but OH MY GOD IT'S AN EXTENDABLE KNIFE THING, and DUDE.

This was a violent blog entry. Let's all hug now:


There. I feel better, don't you?
- LV

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It Was A Weird Day. I Accidentally Cross-Dressed.

Blog
* I think that qualifies as a 'weird day.' Title is from the US Office.

* I apologize for the lack of posting yesterday. Real life drama occurred.

Politics
* I have no idea why this picture of Sarah Palin and a white horse exists:

[Found at Wonkette]
And, despite the article, that is not a unicorn. No horn, you see. Also, is it a compliment to have horses running through the skull of someone you admire? No, I'm asking. Because I did not know that.

Zombies
* Zombieland is the greatest zombie movie of the year. You all need to study the survival skills of Tallahassee. Read my review here.

* The dudes who wrote Star Trek are going to write the screenplay for Xombie, the comic of a sentient zombie protecting a young girl. This rules. I loved the reboot of Star Trek, and I love zombies, and I love these guys for making a good reboot, so there is no snark to be had in this category AT ALL.

Apocalypse How?
* I hate flying. Like, I really hate flying. I am convinced the plane is going to fall out of the sky, and I will PLUMMET, strapped into it.

Of course, I fly all over the place, and have been to Europe and plan to travel more. I'm just miserable in the plane, and cry for nine hours straight.

But now even those of you who aren't afraid of flying will cry! Because airport rectal exams could be in our future! Because if terrorists are shoving bombs up their butts (which is the grossest visual of the morning, yet) and so no one's butt will be SAFE.

I'm not sure how this applies to the apocalypse, except when a society is spending so much time looking up each other's rectums you know things aren't going well.

Epic!Fail
* This is Breast Cancer Awareness month, right? People are wearing pink, to support breast cancer research. This is a good thing. In theory. Not if you drive a bus in Illinois. Dude wore a pink tie, to support Breast Cancer awareness, and got SUSPENDED, without pay, for not wearing the standard uniform.

To be clear: Guy was not wearing a Hooters shirt (although, for breast cancer awareness, that might actually help). Guy was not wearing a Party Naked shirt. He was wearing a tie, to SUPPORT Breast Cancer Awareness. What a monster, yeah? EPIC, EPIC!FAIL Illinois Mass Transit.

Books
* I would like these bookshelves. I would like them very much:

[Found at Like Cool]
THEY HAVE WHEELS. I'm excited by anything mobile. And I need to put away my books. They are slowly taking over the house. It will be a glorious avalanche of LEARNING.

Daily Hot Guy

[Woody Harrelson, AKA Tallahassee from Zombieland. He is the ONLY man who can wear a snakeskin jacket and still be sexy as HELL. Plus, he's the dude you want to look for when the zombies attack. Plus he likes Twinkies. And he has a Southern accent. AND HE QUOTED DELIVERANCE. I'm sorry, I really loved the movie. And Woody.]

Childhood!Fail
* OH HOLY FUCK THE HUMANITY KILL IT KILL IT GET IT AWAY:

[Found at Geekologie]
PEE WEE HERMAN TOYS THEY ARE HERE TO STEAL YOUR SOUL. HIT THEM WITH MR. HAMMER.

Nostalgia!Win
* When I was in the fourth grade I broke my arm horseback riding, and spent most of the summer playing Mortal Kombat Trilogy, and I KICKED EVERYONE'S ASS. Really, when you have nothing to do and it's summer, you get really good at video games really fast. I knew every cheat. I also loved the movies, and maybe had a crush on Raiden, and James Remar until he showed up in Sex & The City and FORNICATED with my childhood. Anyway, Scorpion was bad-ass:


More later, I promise. Or not. It's Monday, and I am going to ingest caffeine until I can FLY:
- LV

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I Can Finally Build That Lake House, & I'll Run Around Naked All Day

Blog
* I will not be visiting your lake house. Title is from Harvey Birdman, Attorney at Law.

Politics
* Remember when the President made one of his Very Important Speeches? And everyone was talking about Bobby Jindal, who would strike terror into the hearts of liberals everywhere? And recharge the Republican party? And then he came out, and nobody could understand what the hell he was talking about, and he seemed like a wet noodle, and everyone was like, all, never mind?

Well, Bobby Jindal hates ACORN too, and is cutting their funding, because they are EVIL, not that they had any funding ANYWAY, but he wants to cut their funding, damn it, and wants you to know about it. So now you know.

Food
* Do you love cakes? Of course you do. Do you love Threadless T-Shirts? Well, OBVIOUSLY. Everyone does. So why has it taken someone so long to combine the two? Let's not dwell on the negative. Suffice it to say, someone took this shirt:

[Found at Threadless]
And turned it into this culinary masterpiece:

[Found at Thread Cakes]
There is a whole website for this contest, but this one was my favorite. Now I want to eat shirts. What? There's precious little caffeine in my system right now.

Celebrity!Fail
* This is one of those incidents where it's not just the celebrity's fault, but 'Normal People Fail' doesn't have the same ring, does it? Here's what happened:
Jane Smith, who is on Hung, and who I like a lot (in no small part because she is the Saddest Person Ever in pretty much every role)was at a restaurant, couldn't pay her check, and didn't tip her waiter. Her waiter, annoyed, Twittered about it. She saw it and complained. he got fired, the end.
Now, as an actor, you need to totally get over the fact that if you do something lame, (like not tipping your waiter) people will be annoyed, and most likely complain about it. Get over it. You ALWAYS tip your waiter, unless you're Steve Buscemi in Reservoir Dogs, but that's totally different. And fictional.
And if you're someone in the service industry with any common sense, you don't whine about specific celebrities BY NAME on a public communication network like Twitter. Because there will be REPERCUSSIONS.
In conclusion, everyone calm the hell down. It's not a big deal. We will all survive this. Remember to tip your waiters.

Zombies
* I am seeing Zombieland today. FINALLY. And soon Walking Dead will be on TV, and life will be GOOD, as we all come to terms with the imminent menace facing humanity. Here's an interview where Robert Kirkman, writer of the epic comic series, discusses the show. It fills me with GLEE. Not the show, Glee. Although now I'm imagining Rachel fighting zombies, and it's FANTASTIC.

Apocalypse How?
* Speaking of zombies, (and really, aren't we always) guns are generally accepted as the weapon of choice against the undead (but remember, hand-to-hand combat weapons are vital, and should not be ignored in your arsenal), apparently America has a shitload of guns, but NO BULLETS. NO BULLETS AT ALL. So unless you plan on overpowering an army of zombies by hitting them repeatedly on the head, this would be a good time to panic, or maybe start making your own bullets. I have no idea how to do this. Do the Winchester brothers know? Who has their number?

Daily Hot Guy(s)

[Milo Ventimiglia (I SPELLED IT RIGH) and Adrian Pasdar, AKA Peter and Nathan Petrelli from Heroes. Peter is annoying me so much less this season, which is nice. And Nathan is such a scumbag that I find him rather attractive (especially this season, for obvious reasons. But mostly I like this picture because I shriek BROMANCE IS CANON, then run off giggling like a dork, simply to annoy other Heroes fans.]

Epic!Fail
* Some lady was driving home, and some kids asked her to splash them with a puddle. She did so, much to their delight. Now she may be facing charges because water ruins the lives of children everywhere. And fun. Fun is frowned upon. And, you know, cherished memories, joys, laughter....

OK, more later, if you're lucky, because it is a rainy day and there is MUCH to do.
- LV

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The Pen Is Mightier Than The Sword, If You Shoot That Pen Out Of A Gun!

Blog
* Inventors, get on this. Title is from The Colbert Report.

* Michelle understands Carl Sagan (AND has the YouTube video with him and Stephen Hawking, who is one of my all-time heroes), and she drew this:

The Exhaustion of Truth by *DanceswithElvis on deviantART
I'm pretty sure she's a wizard. A pirate wizard. From the future.

Freakangels Friday
* It is Friday, ergo FREAKANGELS, yes? No. Because book 3 ended last week, and even a god as old and powerful as Warren Ellis needs to rest from time to time, and we all need a break before book 4 begins, and maybe Karl will be OK, yeah?
Anyway. I demand this signed copy of Book 3, because I think the cover so freaking sweet:

[Found at Comic Cavalcade]
I also unabashedly lust after this journal, and since Mr. Ellis is benevolent enough to provide us with this comic free of charge, we must buy these products. I do. I have a bag. Maybe I'll post pictures on my ElleVee blog (SHAMELESS PROMOTION!).
I'm not done with my first cup of coffee, and there's no FREAKANGELS. Are you sure it's Friday?

Epic!Fail
* Oh, Ralph Lauren, you just don't want ANYONE to like you, do you? You take a beautiful, sexy woman, Photoshop the shit out of her until she looks like a freak cartoon character, and fire her for being too fat. I don't even need to say anything on that. You think this woman:

is FAT. So you made her look like a bobble head.
You scare me, Mr. Lauren. I never bought your clothes because they're too expensive and not my style, but I am not buying them with PASSION now.
This is the best article on the whole debacle, and also has ushered in my new favorite model, Crystal Renn:

That chick is a BAMF.
In conclusion, Mr. Ralph Lauren, your shirts are stupid and ugly.

WTF, INTERNET?
* How many products exist out there for people who are too lazy to wipe their own ass?

If you are disabled, or actually UNABLE to perform these tasks, that is FINE. But if you are just a crazy, lazy bastard, then I am rolling my eyes so hard I may have caused permanent injury.
You go to the bathroom, you wipe your ass, YOU MOVE ON. THERE SHOULD NOT BE ANY SORT OF DISCUSSION ON THIS TOPIC. I HATE THAT I HAVE TO HAVE AN OPINION ON ASS-WIPING.
And the comparison with a back-scrubber upset me. And if you're somehow getting FECES everywhere whenever you go to the bathroom, YOU ARE DOING SOMETHING WRONG.
Christ, sometimes I despise the internet. Just go get a goddamn bidet. Those are funny.

Girly Shit
* I am almost 100% sure that I would fall down and die an embarrassing death if I tries to walk in these heels:

[Found at Style]
I don't know if I even want them. They're fairly ugly. But they are shiny and green, and like a magpie I am drawn to the shiny. And I sort of can't shake the suspicion that if I pressed my thumb against the shoe's surface, it would change colors with my body heat.
Do they MAKE heels like that?

Daily Hot Guy

[Jayne Cobb from Firefly. I know he's really Adam Baldwin, but I cannot see him as anyone but Jayne. He's Jayne, OK? He's the hero from Canton! Fuck me, now I really need to watch Firefly again. Did you know Jayne had a crush on Kaylee? Let's just talk about Firefly for a while. What's your favorite episode? Requested by Kristamaru, who found Serenity, but keeps the sky from me, because she doesn't like to share.]

Music
* I love this video for the Muse song 'Uprising.' I love pretty much everything affiliated with Muse. I remember I first heard them a few years back, when my uncle gave me a CD of one of their live shows. EPIC WIN.


WhedonVerse
* This is a good news/bad news situation for those of us seriously looking forward to Cabin In The Woods:
Bad News: The movie has been movie to January of 2011, which is so far in the future I don't know if my Google Calendar can process it! (It can. I just checked).
Good News: It's being pushed back so they can make it a 3-D movie.
My Opinion: I don't care if it's in 3-D, but since I have no SAY in the matter, I will be excited about it and look forward to the 3-D gorefest.
They should make more posters, though. I need those.

Technology
* Could someone explain what the fuck Google Wave is? Because I keep hearing about it, so it's begun to aggravate me, but I'm far too lazy to find out what it is on my own, and whenever I have made a half-assed attempt to find it, I end up on some page where people much more technologically gifted than me discuss its specs.
So, what is it? And should I care?

Art
* This is fucking upsetting. It almost went under WTF, INTERNET, but you can't BUY it, which is the WTF qualification, in general. Warning: This is horrible and weird. Even if it is a hoax.
This dude made an art project. It is a long, wooden tunnel, that gets progressively smaller, more cramped, and more uncomfortable as you crawl through it. When you finally squeeze out at the end, HE TRIES TO RAPE YOU:

I've constructed a 22 ft tunnel out of plywood that leads into the project room. There is no way in or out of the project room except for this tunnel. As you travel through the tunnel, it gets smaller and smaller, making it so that you have to crawl and put yourself in a submissive position in order to reach the tunnel's destination. At the end of the tunnel the subject will find me waiting in the project room and I'll try to the best of my ability to overpower and rape the person who crawls through.

Yes, it all turned out to be an elaborate bullshit thing, to make a 'point,' which aggravates me on SO MANY LEVELS, but that is NOT THE POINT. Why would you even THINK of this? Who thinks, 'well, for art, I'm going to do me some RAPING.'
I couldn't find out whether his PUNCH YOU IN THE FACE TUNNEL was also bullshit, but it's too insane NOT to talk about. This was just like the rape tunnel, only instead of raping you at the end, he'd punch you in the face. Subtle:

As it turns out, I ended up breaking the nose of the third person to crawl through the tunnel, an aspiring model. She went to the hospital and eventually sued me. Her modeling career was put on hold. The civil case was long and drawn out and the matter still hasn’t been resolved. To this day she still has unpaid medical bills. The point of this long aside is that all this took place two years ago, and I’m still having an impact on this young lady’s life, something not many other artists could claim about their work

Rape seemed like the next logical step.

RAPE IS NEVER THE NEXT LOGICAL STEP. The only 'dialogue' this has created is A) some people are fucking hideous, B) I miss the days when art was just nice drawings and sculptures, and didn't involve VIOLENCE, and C) there is no point to this sort of art, it's just masturbatory idiocy, and to use one of my favorite quotes, 'Just because no one understands you, doesn't make you an artist.'

Comics
* So I need to play Arkham Asylum, because it will teach me stuff I need to know for my life, and you all know how I like learning:

If you're a thug and you're in a situation where it looks like you and some other thugs might be able to gang up on Batman, don't do it.
Just walk away.

Is there a Mac compatible version of Arkham Asylum? Why are you all laughing?

Tattoo Of Win
* Would you take $15,000 to have a website address permanently tattooed on your forehead?

[Found at Business Ideas]
This chick did. And more people have advertising tattoos. I remember No Fear.

OK, enough for now.
- LV

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You & Your Friends Threw Pee Balloons At Me.

Blog
* Oh, Kurt. I promise, after high school, that almost NEVER happens. Title is from Glee.


[Drawn by Erin]
* Is this picture, titled 'Cynthia,':
A) A beautiful drawing wherein the physical detail counterbalances the surrealism of the piece?
B) Making me think of Rugrats, solely because Angelica had a doll called Cynthia?
C) Now making me sort of think of Toy Story, and the Baby Head doll, although I have NO idea why?
D) Scaring the crap out of me, because she has crazy eyes and too many legs?
E) All of the above?

Girly Shit
* Who is this girl, and why does she have hair that should be mine?

I want this hair. Not the clearly fake pink extensions, but that haircut. So I need longer hair. Someone make this happen.

* I'd also like these boots:

[Found at Net-A-Porter]
Have you been to this site? It's like, 'look at all the pretty stuff you could buy if you just had a ton more money!'

WTF, INTERNET?
* OH, COME ON:

[Found at Drinking Stuff]
THIS IS RIDICULOUS. You freeze the mold, and then you have 'rock hard boobs' that pour booze out for a bachelor party. OK, as a heterosexual girl maybe I don't know these things, but don't guys NOT like rock hard boobs? Aren't they supposed to generally feel like, you know, boobs? I know it's a beverage dispenser, but why would you say 'rock hard boobs like it's a PLUS?

More importantly could someone, preferably someone with a degree in psychology, explain the urge that apparently overcomes some men and makes them want to drink cheap booze from the cold, fake nipples of a disembodied torso? Because I need to avoid those guys. Because by the end of the night, the breasts will MELT, and nobody wants to see that.

Can't you just hire a stripper like everyone else?

Life Lessons
* The dudes who think boob luges are hilarious should probably read this article on signs that you are bad at dating. Not that I want them to reproduce. Can you imagine baby's first birthday? 'Hey, honey, what say you we break out the boob luge and fill it with MILK?'

Music
* Birds perched on wires transcribed into music?

Birds on the Wires from Jarbas Agnelli on Vimeo.

Shockingly lovely melody. The birds know things. I always suspected they did.

Daily Hot Guy

[Mads Mikkelsen, AKA, The Totally Hot Villain In Casino Royale. And he was the only part of King Arthur that didn't make me want to stab out my eyes. Requested by Lindragon, who probably doesn't have to check the spelling of Mr. Mikkelsen's name every time she types it.]

TwiHate
* This is not hating the movies, the books, or the fans, but the people who smack a pair of fangs onto some random object, claim its 'inspired by Twilight,' and make an assload of money:

[Found at Regretsy]
Stop it. Seriously. Right now. Unless you're holding the glass at just the right angle, you just look like some moron with soap scum on your glass.

Hunter S. Thompson
* I have said numerous times that my next tattoo will have a Hunter S. Thompson theme to it, for obvious reasons of deep love and admiration:

[Found at LOLTATZ]
I'm seriously reconsidering that decision now.

Journalism
* Warren Ellis is PISSED:

Newspaper Legally Prevented From Reporting On Government

The Guardian is actually FORBIDDEN from reporting THE NEWS. And Mr. Ellis, creator of Spider Jerusalem, is not well pleased. Nor am I. What if Woodward and Bernstein had just gone, 'Oh, OK? Never mind, we'll just NOT report on Watergate.' WATCHMEN COULD HAVE HAPPENED, ONLY WITHOUT THE SUPERHEROES AND WITH NUCLEAR APOCALYPSE FAIL.

That's an exaggeration. But my point remains valid. Journalists have an obligation to report the truth, and any government that tries to interfere with that will on create more distrust in its people.

Oh, Thursday, you scandalous beast. Bring it.
- LB

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You Don't Know What Words MEAN, Do You?

Blog
* No, I've been faking it all these years. It's rather obvious if you've been paying attention. Title is from Mr. Show, which I miss. Why isn't this on Netflix instant viewing?

* The look of pure, abject horror on this guys' face is awe-inspiring:

[Drawn by Erin]
If it's not food, WHAT IS HE EATING?

World Peace Through Jackie Earle Haley
* New episode is up, where we discuss the new A Nightmare On Elm Street Trailer, and we have many opinions, and Maniac Cop 3 is awesome.

TeeVee
* Hi, Universe, could you do me a favor? It's a small one: Could you NOT turn Heathers into a TV series, thus ruining the movie and destroying one of my few fond memories of Winona Ryder? And if you are determined to ruin one of my favorite high school movies, could you NOT hire one of the writers from Sex & the City to completely miss the point and be worried more about being clever than telling a story or having characters that seem REMOTELY like real people? I hate Sex & the City. CARRIE BRADSHAW WAS A TERRIBLE WRITER, DRESSER, AND HUMAN BEING. So I don't want Heathers: Carrie Goes Back To High School & Gets To Thinking About Murder, OK?!

Geek Want
* OMIGOD. I almost put this under 'Stuff To Live,' because everyone alive needs a big damn model of Serenity (from the movie, not the TV show), signed by Captain Mal 'The Hammer Is My Penis; Reynolds, AKA Nathan Fillion:

[Found at Topless Robot]
OMIGOD. It's not that big (19 by 12 inches), but it's handmade, and it can be modified to your specifications. AND IT'S PRETTY. OK, it's also $2500, which is almost a laughable amount of money, but I'm disregarding that because $2500 doesn't really exist, anyway.

Awesome
* OK, we have to be nice to NASA for like, a month, because they sent a Twitter feed from the satellite that crashed into the moon. So, you say? WELL, it just so happens that the feed Tweeted lines from A Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy, when the sperm whale plummets to Magrathea. Seriously. I love you NASA. I take back everything bad I've said about you, and you get a free pass for a week. Then the mockery resumes.

Movie!Win
* Warren Ellis is writing a movie. If I have to explain why this is win, you are beyond help.

Daily Hot Guy

[Eddie Izzard, proving brains, British-ness, humor, stubble, and an innate understanding of heels makes for a very sexy man. His comedy is funny for always. And he can pull off outfits I would never dare. Requested by Kristamaru, who essentially runs this category, and I am GLAD she does]

Wow
* Rorschachschick sent me this image. I don't remember why. I don't know where she found it, or if she made it. I know nothing but what it tells me. But I can't stop staring at it:

Yeah, coffee went up my nose when I saw this. Centipedes are SCARY.

Animals
* Daw, it's a gosling with a little robotic leg brace!

[Found at Boing Boing]
I want a robo-goose. I know I should be screaming about fuzzy baby geese overtaking the world, but it's CUTE, OK?! And it's Wednesday and if our goose overlords are downy and quack, I can't be that upset.

More later. Need to go on a quest, in which my goal is MASSIVE amounts of caffeine.
- LV

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If You Type 'Google' Into Google, You Can Break The Internet.

Blog
* This is true. Except for the lies. Title is from The It Crowd.

* How did I not know there was an X-Men/Star Trek crossover comic? Something that freaking weird needs to be in my life. Good thing I have Theresa and her comic blog to show me Spock and Wolverine. I love that last sentence. It's delightfully geeky.

* Yet another reason I shouldn't write this blog while having breakfast:

[Drawn by Erin]
Now I'm nervously watching my egg. This is going to end badly, isn't it? Most sinister egg EVER. That is the Moriarty of eggs.

Torchwood
* I have to admit, I didn't watch this video again before I posted it. Because it makes me cry, and that is embarrassing for SO MANY reasons, because Children of the Earth happened MONTHS ago, and it's fiction, and I need to move on with my Torchwood rage:

Ianto wouldn't make me drink coffee without sugar. Just saying.

Inglourious Basterds
* Have I posted this video before? Of Quentin Tarantino's top movies since 1992? Probably, but I like it, and it's funny and interesting, and I don't care. So I'm going to post it again, and you'll all enjoy it, because it's Quentin Tarantino (NOTE: Those of you who dislike Tarantino probably won't enjoy it. No sense in lying to you):


Star Trek
* This is the best, most accurate list of the best to worst Star Trek movies. Wrath of Khan will always be the best. Deal with it. And First Contact was freaking amazing, especially with Data being all badass and scamming on the Borg Queen. And Insurrection sucked. But my least favorite movie is still The Motion Picture. Did you see that film? Even as a little kid, I was like, 'Damn, that us sub-par filmmaking.'

And I'm glad they didn't include the new Star Trek reboot on this list, because I dearly love it, and don't want to have to put it above or below the 'classic' movies. Note: The last two Next Generation movies are not classics. Sorry.

People I Love
* Speaking of Spock (HA, almost alliteration), I'm sure you've all seen the video Hostage: A Love Story, featuring Zachary Quinto. It's one of the best things ever. My favorite scenes are:
1. When Zachary Quinto yells at his penis, and
2. When Zachary Quinto yells at the drooling baby.

HOSTAGE: A Love Story with Zachary Quinto from Zachary Quinto

It's so freaking funny. Heroes should include a plotline where Sylar yells at his crotch. It would be funny.

Daily Hot Guy

[Jonathan Rhys-Meyers, who is very pretty, but not my type, in part because in pictures he tends to have Crazy Eyes. I saw this picture and yelled, 'KING HENRY DID NOT LOOK LIKE THAT. HISTORICAL INNACURACY.' I know nobody else cares. Requested by Lindragon, whose history book is filled with strangely attractive royalty.

Fandom
* It's so funny, I was JUST discussing Lord of the Rings on Twitter. Not like this. NEVER like this. Treebeard would NEVER do this to Bill the pony. Who would IMAGINE doing this to Bill the pony? I'm crying, on the inside. Megan, don't read this. Seriously. You will NOT be OK. I'm not OK. I'm going to go reread the books, and pretend this atrocity never took place.

Stuff To Live
* This is a toilet paper/tissue holder. I think it's pretty:

[Found at Incredible Things]
That's it. I just like it. Aren't they cool?

Writing
* I love onomatopoeia. In part because I can spell it. Actually, that may be the only reason I love that word. I also like tasers:

[Found at Indexed]

Movie!Fail
* Reasons I will not be excited about the Ridley Scott vampire movie: I hated Gladiator. I'm sorry. No, I'm not, really. It was like Braveheart, only worse (I wasn't crazy about Braveheart), and it was stupid, and deserved NO Oscar nominations. And I love Ridley Scott, but he is not a consistently non-suckish director (did you see A Good Year? That shit HURT), and the screenwriter has positives and negatives in his resume. And I'm tired of vampires, even if I wrote a book about them, unless they are A) scary, B) funny, or C) unaffiliated with Stephene Meyers or Anne Rice. I hated Interview With The Vampire, too. That one I am sorry about. Maybe.

OK, enough of that.
- LV

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