Friday, January 2, 2009

2009 Doesn't Start Until The Hangover Ends

Happy 2009. Let's hope this year is better than last year, with fewer violent deaths, horrific tragedies, bad hair, and depressing movies.

To celebrate the New Year, I humbly present to my loyal readers the First Annual Fear And Loathing Awards, a look back at the books I read in 2008. Here we'll see the best, worst, and weirdest shit I read in 2008. Enjoy!

Books That Make Me Want To Grab A Sword And Kick Ass
Gentlemen Of The Road - Michael Chabon
The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas

Shortest Profound Book Ever
The Marriage Of Heaven & Hell - William Blake

Best Play
Waiting For Godot - Samuel Beckett

Book That I Was Uncomfortable To Read In Public Because Damn Was It Creepy
Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov

Book That Made Me Weep Like A Prison Bitch
The Road - Cormac McCarthy
The Schwa Was Here - Neal Shusterman
Flowers For Algernon - Daniel Keyes

Overrated Books That I Still Liked
Fragile Things: Short Fictions And Wonders - Neil Gaiman
Stardust - Neil Gaiman
On Chesil Beach - Ian McEwan

Scariest Goddamn Books
Heart-Shaped Box - Joe Hill
Coraline - Neil Gaiman
Arkham Asylum: A Serious House On Serious Earth - Grant Morrison
59. 20th Century Ghosts - Joe Hill
The Stand - Stephen King (Reread)

Best Discworld Novels (Or, Best Novels Ever)
Night Watch - Terry Pratchett
Reaper Man - Terry Pratchett
Mort - Terry Pratchett
Interesting Times - Terry Pratchett

Soul Music - Terry Pratchett
Men At Arms - Terry Pratchett
Lords & Ladies - Terry Pratchett
Small Gods - Terry Pratchett
Witches Abroad - Terry Pratchett
Guards! Guards! - Terry Pratchett
Moving Pictures - Terry Pratchett

Worst Discworld Novels (That Still Manage To Be Pretty Damn Great)
The Light Fantastic - Terry Pratchett
Equal Rites - Terry Pratchett
Sourcery - Terry Pratchett
Pyramids - Terry Pratchett
Wyrd Sisters - Terry Pratchett

Books I Wish I'd Written
Jonathan Strange And Mr. Norrell - Susanna Clarke
Collected Fictions - Jorge Luis Borges
The Crimson Petal And The White - Michael Faber

Most Sanctimonious Cookbooks
Vegan Express - Nava Atlas
Peace In Every Bite: A Vegan Cookbook - Two Moons

Best Comic Series To Be Ruined By The Hot Topic Crowd
The Sandman, Volume 2: The Doll's House - Neil Gaiman

The Sandman, Volume 3: Dream Country - Neil Gaiman
The Sandman, Volume 4: Season Of Mists - Neil Gaiman
The Sandman, Volume 5: A Game Of You - Neil Gaiman

Best-Named Comic
Hellblazer: Fear & Loathing - Garth Ennis

Overrated Books I 'Got', But Didn't Enjoy
Neverwhere - Neil Gaiman

Books I Didn't Realize I Liked Until The Very Last Page
The Yiddish Policeman's Union - Michael Chabon
Neuromancer - William Gibson
Disgrace - J.M. Coetzee

Worst/Most Disappointing Books Of The Year
An Arsonist's Guide To Writer's Homes In New England - Brock Clarke
Needful Things - Stephen King
Snuff - Chuck Palahniuk
Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency - Douglas Adams
The Knife Thrower And Other Stories - Steven Millhauser
60. Viriconium - M. John Harrison
A Dirty Job - Christopher Moore

Best Addiction-Suffering Superhero EVER
Iron Man: Demon In A Bottle - David Michelinie
Invincible Iron Man #1 - Matt Fraction
Iron Man Volume 1: Extremis - Warren Ellis
Invincible Iron Man #2 - Matt Fraction

Best Nonfiction
Sweet And Low - Rich Cohen
A Short History Of Nearly Everything - Bill Bryson
When You Are Engulfed In Flames - David Sedaris
The Year Of Magical Thinking - Joan Didion
Dreams From My Father - Barack Obama
An Anthropologist On Mars - Oliver Sacks
Heat: An Amateur's Adventures as Kitchen Slave, Line Cook, Pasta-Maker, and Apprentice to a Dante-Quoting Butcher in Tuscany - Bill Buford

Best Beach-Reads
Four Past Midnight - Stephen King

Best Comic Ever In The History Of Ever
Watchmen - Alan Moore (Reread)

Best Books To Be Made Into Ass-Kicking Movies
No Country For Old Men - Cormac McCarthy
American Splendor: Our Movie Year - Harvey Pekar
Hellboy, Volume 1: Seed Of Destruction - Mike Mignola

The Prestige - Christopher Priest

Best Mix Of Great & Terrible Comic Artists
SPX 2003 Anthology - Comic Book Legal Defense Fund

Best Book On How Totally Fucked Up Polygamy Is
The 19th Wife - David Ebershoff

Most Hated Book Series That I Didn't Hate Until Everyone Started Gushing About How It Was The BEST SERIES EVER OMGWTFBBQ
New Moon - Stephenie Meyer

Twilight - Stephenie Meyer

Books That Were Surprisingly Good
Three Minutes On Love - Roccie Hill
Girl With A Pearl Earring - Tracy Chevalier

Best Kids' Books That Really Aren't
The Tales Of Beedle The Bard - J.K. Rowling
The Graveyard Book - Neil Gaiman
Harry Potter & The Sorcerer's Stone - J.K. Rowling (Reread)

Best Books About Books.... And Incest
The Thirteenth Tale- Diane Setterfield
The Shadow Of The Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon

Books That I Know Are Great, But That I Didn't Really Like
American Pastoral - Philip Roth

Shit-Your-Pants-Funny Books Everyone Should Worship
A Confederacy Of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole (Reread)

Best Use Of Extreme Violence And Sexual Abuse Involving Hamsters In A Comic Series
The Boys #9 - Garth Ennis
50. The Boys #8 - Garth Ennis

Best Book That Reminded Me Of Pan's Labyrinth, But In A Good Way
The Book Of Lost Things - John Connolly

Best Short Comic
The Cat With The Really Big Head & One Other Story That Isn't As Good - Roman Dirge

Book That Convinces Me The Neighbor's Cat Ate My Goddamn Owl
Harry Potter And The Chamber Of Secrets - J.K. Rowling

Top Ten Favorite Books Of The Year (Not Counting Rereads)
Interesting Times - Terry Pratchett
Jonathan Strange And Mr. Norrell - Susanna Clarke
The Year Of Magical Thinking - Joan Didion
Dreams From My Father - Barack Obama
Small Gods - Terry Pratchett
Waiting For Godot - Samuel Beckett
The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas
The Road - Cormac McCarthy
Heat: An Amateur's Adventures as Kitchen Slave, Line Cook, Pasta-Maker, and Apprentice to a Dante-Quoting Butcher in Tuscany - Bill Buford
Hellboy, Volume 1: Seed Of Destruction - Mike Mignola

Bottom Ten Books Of The Year
American Pastoral - Philip Roth
New Moon - Stephenie Meyer
An Arsonist's Guide To Writer's Homes In New England - Brock Clarke
Needful Things - Stephen King
Snuff - Chuck Palahniuk
Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency - Douglas Adams
The Knife Thrower And Other Stories - Steven Millhauser
60. Viriconium - M. John Harrison
A Dirty Job - Christopher Moore
Neverwhere - Neil Gaiman

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