Saturday, November 21, 2009

Is That Community Theater Or Are You Naturally Like This?

Blog
* I'm whichever makes you love me more, Dean Winchester. Title is from Supernatural.

* I know, I know, bad blogger, blah blah blah. Some weeks I can't blog every day. I'M JUST A PERSON.

* Patience is on my list of people I want to be when I grow up:

She MADE that. I know. I think she has magic powers.

Art
* This conversation just took place via Gchat:
Me: Check out this door handle:

[Found at Geekologie]
Friend: Holy shit.
Me: It's a DOOR HANDLE.
Friend: That's really scary.
Me: Are you kidding? Imagine going to some guys' house for a first date, and that's his door handle. He's going to be the coolest dude. Think about it!
Friend: On the plus side, we probably won't be fighting over guys anytime soon.

Comics
* I'd like Marvel Smartass to be president. Of something. Somewhere. This is why.

Words Of Win

[Found at Passive Aggressive Notes]

Life Lessons
* Your pizza preferences tell a lot about your personality. Look at mine:
Meat feast (Beef, ham, pepperoni, chicken, sausage and bacon): Everything you do is related to sex. You're a life support system for a crotch. Get help.

Yep, that's - HEY WAIT A SECOND. CAN I CHANGE MY ANSWER?
Pepperoni Perfection (Double pepperoni, mushrooms and onions): You have lovely hair and gentle eyes. And breath that could fell a hippo.

Much better. HEY.

Whut?
* I.... I don't think there's a CORRECT statement to make about this painting:

[Found at Regretsy]
It's VERY WELL PAINTED. Totally. But... THE FLIES ARE MAKING BABY FLIES. Flies deserve privacy. Also, I never want to see insects doing it. And I just don't get it. At all. I am culturally IGNORANT.

Food!Fail
* I have a deep, deep aversion to flavored beers. Not so much (at all) flavored ciders, and I will drink anything from England, because I have a deep and fierce love for all things English. But due to the Adventures With Pumpkin-Flavored Beer, I cannot support beer that is supposed to taste like watermelon:

[Found at SlashFood]
Which is too bad, because the can is super-cool, and I enjoy beer greatly. No, LV! Remember Oktoberfest! REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED.
Right. Flavored beer is evil, my friends. YOU WILL NOT TEMPT ME WITH YOUR WILES, SERPENT OF MY DESTRUCTION.

Daily Hot Guy
edward norton Pictures, Images and Photos
[Edward Norton. I love him, and hope he decides to be in The Avengers movie, because the idea of him and Robert Downey, Jr. acting together makes me almost black out with happy.]

Politics
* I love Texas hardcore, even though I've never been there, because awesome people live there, and they deep-fry EVERYTHING, and it's warm there. But John Culberson needs to maybe shut up. Because Hillary Clinton is busy with her job, and doesn't have time for marijuana in England or whatever bullshit your quacking about. Now deep fry me some butter. FOR AMERICA.

* I want to buy this for someone. For reals:

[Found at Regretsy]
This is even better because the seller insists it's spelled right. I love EVERYONE.

* Hi, Universe. First of all, judicial misconduct does NOT mean it's not rape. Second, lying about rape is bad. Especially when your lies are used as defense for the rapist. Third, maybe Roman Polanski uses all his genius in movies, which would explain the almost frighteningly bad life choices he makes. Just a thought. Love, LV

Epic!Fail
* This may be illegal, or plagiarism, and I will take it down if need be, but you need to read this whole article to understand how epic this fail IS:
'Flasher' causes bus to hit police station

The alleged flasher being blamed for a bus crash in Hamilton is just 14-years-old.

Police say the teenager exposed himself to a fellow bus passenger, causing the terrified woman to scream.

The driver immediately drove to a nearby police station on River Rd, with the woman still screaming.

The driver stopped and opened the door, but unfortunately forgot to put the bus into neutral.

The vehicle rolled forward, crashing into the police station's entrance way.

No one was injured but the bus suffered a cracked windscreen and the building received minor damage.

Police have arrested the 14-year-old boy and charged him with carrying out an indecent act.

There is nothing I could possibly add to this story. NOTHING. Everything fails here. And everyone. Lady, it's a child's penis. That's weird and awkward, but insane hysterical screaming is MAYBE not the best way to respond. JUST A SUGGESTION.

OK, all done for the moment.
- LV

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