Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Just Shoot Him! You Told Him You Would. Don't Pad Your Part!

Blog
* Actors are not pillars of honesty, in general. Title is from Mystery Science Theater 3000.

* This week, we have a special surprise coming up for readers of FEAR AND LOATHING. And by we, I mean my blog, and by 'special surprise,' I mean, 'special guest of super-awesome win. IN SPACE.' OK, not in space. I will continue to be mysterious about this. Such is my way.

* 'Sozzled' is my Word of 2010. But I think we need to add 'jimbobbery' to the list, as Miss Banshee has in her blog. Also, DOGGIE HEADBUTTZ.

Crafts
* I love handspun yarn, particularly when I know the people selling it, and they are made of magic and win and genius, and their yarn is so fabulous I just want to sleep on a pile of it. This is all Spazzy Yarn-describing. She makes the most gorgeous yarn, and when I am rich she will be one of a select few of my private Yarn-Makers.

In the meantime, here is a contest where you can win some of her glorious yarn. Enter it. Your knitting needles will thank you.

Girly!Want
* These shoes are pink, which is not a color I am usually associated with, but under the right circumstances I will be ALL OVER pink. These are the right circumstances:

[Found at Jak and Jil]
They should belong to me. They are amazing, and I will prance around England in my pink, pink shoes.

Life Lessons
* This is all truth, in one index card:

[Found at Indexed]

Ad!Win
* Normally, these sort of ads go under AD!FAIL, but it is so funny and surreal, and I like to imagine that Andy Warhol directed it, or maybe Uwe Boll (for different reasons) that it goes under Win. The description here helps to no end:
Any product that gives me rock-hard abs so that offscreen voiceover woman will f*ck me, and also I’m Santa, is a product for me.

Santa A) Does not have abs, and B) Does not have sex. OK? Let me cling to these notions.

House!Win
*HEHEHEHEHE, THE TOAST IS IN JAIL! ROASTING:

[Found at Incredible Things]
OK, technically the toast is TOASTING in jail, but I can watch it and laugh and enjoy torturing toast. I am grouchy in the morning. My toast should suffer accordingly.

Daily Hot Guy

[Adam Gontier, lead singer of 3 Days Grace, SANS mohawk. Mohawks, like mustaches, are very hard to pull off. Even the best of people cannot do it sometimes. Requested by Stina, mistress of horror, who is going to run Apple and destroy her enemies. So, you know, be nice to her.]

Doctor Who
* Ignoring for the moment his weird, 'I can fly and make pew pews with my hands,' episode, the Master is all sorts of awesome. I love this scene, because it's stupid and malicious and sort of incredibly funny, and a little bit sexy, and brilliant because few would have the AUDACITY to do it, much like the Master himself:

Plus I like this song. Oh, and is it just me, but does Little Old Doctor look like Peter Boyle? HE DOES.

Harry Potter
* So, has everyone seen the Deathly Hallows trailer?

It doesn't look very good, does it? Then again, I am still annoyed by the royal SHAFTING of every one of my favorite plot lines in Half-Blood Prince, so maybe I am not the best person to review this. (But really, I DO NOT CARE ABOUT HERMIONE BEING SAD, OK? OR RON SMOOCHING PEOPLE. LET'S FOCUS ON BELLATRIX AND HER CRAZY, and the glory that is SNAPE, OK?)

Food!Fail
* These might taste good, but the moment they pass your lips, you die:

[Found at This Is Why You're Fat]
French fries and cheese curd wrapped in a spring roll served with brown gravy dipping sauce.
Oh, if you look at the picture too long, your cholesterol goes up significantly. I should have mentioned that earlier.

Words of Win
song chart memes
see more Funny Graphs

You all think I'm joking about hibernating for the rest of the winter, but I AM NOT JOKING AND I AM COLD AS ALL HELL.
- LV

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