Monday, March 9, 2009

'I Think Fish Is Nice, But Then I Think That Rain Is Wet, So Who Am I To Judge?'

* Apparently, Watchmen made $55.7 million. But it wasn't as much as expected, even though the next most popular movie only made $8.8 million. And the bitchy lady on MSNBC was all, "Nobody will see this more than once." Well, my mission is clear. WHO'S UP FOR A THIRD ROUND?!

* Zack Snyder is not doing a sequel. Thank FUCK. Although he can, if he wants, because I won't be seeing it, for OBVIOUS REASONS. But I have to admit, the idea of a prequel did stir a guilty part of my twisted little soul. Mr. Moore, DON'T HURT ME.

* I know we all need to be realistic about the problems with the economy, and that it's serious, and that we're all in big trouble. They tell me on the TV every freaking day. We're all worried. I GET IT. That being said, maybe Warren Buffet, who most people consider to be the Patron Saint Of Money Matters, shouldn't be doing the verbal equivalent of putting on a scary clown mask and making small children cry. Our morale is low enough. WE UNDERSTAND THAT THERE IS A PROBLEM, MR. BUFFET.

* It is terribly wet and rainy out, and I have to venture out into the brutal storm, like the brave, stalwart soul I am.

* Word to the wise: Do not bother getting into an argument with the Twilight nymphets over why their obsession is stupid and embarrassing to our gender as a whole, especially when you're clutching a Watchmen shirt to your chest like a drowning man clutches a life preserver, and have a mad gleam in your eyes because they have no Rorschach shirts in your size, and they don't even have the damn lunchbox, which you weren't going to BUY, you just wanted to LOOK AT. GOD.

* But seriously, why the FUCK does Hot Topic have, like, a thousand girl shirts pledging eternal fidelity to a shiny, control-freak vampire with bad hair and NONE displaying my unwavering love for Watchmen? Do breasts and a uterus prevent me from enjoying the work of Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons? Does my purchasing of makeup and dresses, and my uninhibited crush on Russell Brand eliminate me from the Holy Order Of Watchmen fans? Explain your logic, Hot Topic. Because Edward sucks.

* Team Rorschach. I'm making the shirt. TRY AND STOP ME.

* Why are political pundits discussing Michelle Obama's arms? When did this qualify as news?

* My library, seriously, sucks. It has, judging by its online catalogue, NO BOOKS. They are UPSETTING ME with their lack of:
- Will Christopher Baer
- Sigmund Freud
- Brian K. Vaughan
- Henry James
- Haruki Murakami
- William S. Burroughs
- Several others who I don't feel like listing.
So I'll go, and return my books, and get some Stephen King, who I think is required reading on dark and stormy days.

* No work today. Everyone at work is sick.So LSAT studying, and a trip to the bank, and more endless pontificating on meaningless crap. Also, my own coughing is becoming ominous. Tea makes everything better, I hear.

* I don't know if my library will be carrying a copy of My Booky Wook by Russell Brand, because I want to read it, so the evil gnomes of said library will conspire against me. What do you do if you want to read a book, but can't really afford books, and your library is run by PURE UNMITIGATED EVIL??

* I really want to dye my hair something crazy. Because I'm bored, and am trying to save money by growing my hair out, instead of cutting it, but right now my hair is disobeying me at every turn. WHEN WILL IT END?!

* I'm thinking of getting the Rorschach blot on my right hip, and the quote on my ribcage above it. Because, while spending money on books and hairstyling is SHALLOW and RIDICULOUS, spending money on comic tattoos is a GOOD INVESTMENT.

* Everybody sucks. Except Russell Brand, and David Tennant, and my dog. And my beloved English relations. And Alan Moore. OK, only a few people suck, but they suck enough to annoy me beyond comprehension.

* Mondays are awful.
- LV

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