Watchmen Musings, Because I Am Bored And Still Ill

So, while perusing the interwebs for other Watchmen lovers like myself, I saw things and heard things. Some were wise, and witty, and completely right on. Some were bullshit. Vague enough? Probably, but here are some thoughts I've had recently, that I'd like to post for posterity.* Rorschach, were he real, would not like me. This may sound INSANE, especially for an intelligent, not-drugged person to be wondering if a fictional character would like them, but it's something a lot of new fans seem to ignore. Most of the characters in this book would hate you. Mine is Rorschach. He would not approve of me. AT ALL. I smoke and drink (or did, until the Dread Flu Of Death), and I am a liberal AND an intellectual. I'd be first on his list of people asking to be saved, and him not saving me. * Rorschach will not, in any reality, be saved by true love. Rorschach is crazy. He has a split personality. The only people he likes are either insane, dead, or primarily constructs of his own psyche (except Dan, but that's another post entirely.) He does not Just Need A Hug (although I would like to hug him, but that's more my problem than anything else). He is Misunderstood, and he is a Tragic Figure, and I adore him for strange and complicated reasons, but he is Not A Nice Guy. He's rather a dick. Also, he smells and is filthy and even if his True Love (whoever you think that would be) made a move, there is a very high chance that the other person would end up with a serious case of Broken Fingers And Death, which is quite contagious around Rorschach.(That being said, I absolutely laugh my ass off at funny renditions of an of the Watchmen. That's not what I'm talking about here. Humor, fanart, fanfiction with angst, that's FINE. My problem is CONFUSED PEOPLE who rewrite Rorschach on ANY level to resemble that assmunching sparkly vampire from the Twilight book. RETRIBUTION SHALL COME.)* I loved the movie, but it wasn't great. Parts were great. And I am seriously considering going to see it again, alone, in part because I think I need to see it once without PUNCHING the person beside me in the arm every time Rorschach comes onscreen, and partly because fucking Race To Witch Mountain knocked it out of number one, and that makes me sad for this country. The movie had problems and issues, and parts weren't elaborated on that I would have liked, and the more I think about it the more convinced I am that Viedt was a wee bit miscast (although everyone else was AWESOME - sorry, trying to be mature).* This movie is the best anyone could expect. A lot of die-hard comic fans will have issue with this. They shouldn't. I've worked (marginally) in film. I've had to adapt screenplays for classes. It is hard as FUCK. And really, Watchmen is unfilmable. I know, I know, they did film it. But go back and read the source material. It can't be done, not the way some people seem to imagine it could be. I am not one of those people who think the movie is never as good as the book (quite often, I think it's better - see Requiem For A Dream, Fight Club, The Godfather...) But this sort of book can't be made into a movie. Zack Snyder really did his best. And I do think ultimately that he preserved the essence of the comic. It felt like Watchmen to me. And I maintain that the opening credits, with Bob Dylan playing, is some truly masterful filmmaking.* This is the best adaptation of Alan Moore's work yet. With apologies to V For Vendetta, and my equally crazy love of V, who is ALSO not a Particularly Nice Fellow, All Things Considered. Although when the other movies in question are League Of Extraordinary Gentlemen and From Hell (WHY JOHNNY DEPP, WHHHYYYY?!) the idea of a WORSE movie is kind of terrifying.Finally: I've updated the Master List of Watchmen Songs/Soundtrack. And I'm too lazy to post the tattoo pics again, so you must actually scroll down for them. Yes, I am cruel.- LV

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