* WHY is Joe from 'Morning Joe' asking about John McEnroe's prostate? Is this really the first image I need to encounter in the morning?* I'm going to the tattoo shop today. Whether I get the tattoo or not today remains to be seen. At the least I'll get my consultation and an estimate.* So, I apparently have lived most of my life under a massive misconception. My entire worldview is SHATTERED beyond repair. Nothing makes sense, and everything is chaos and uncertainty: Basically, I always thought the lyrics to the theme song to the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoon were, "Raphael is cool but rude." I was wrong. Terribly, terribly wrong. The lyrics were "Raphael is cool but crude." See? You can check it out here. Everything I know is a lie. * I really liked 8 Mile (then again, I also really like Eminem), but this version has its own merits (namely less Brittany Murphy). Downside? No Kim Basinger yowling like a tarted-up Paula Deen: Made by the mad geniuses at ISS* Simon Pegg is the man. Ergo, he needs to make this movie now. The Ice Cream Trilogy is the only thing holding back Armageddon. Anyway, I thought Hot Fuzz was kind of brilliant. And Shaun of the Dead needs no explanation. It is zombie love.* I am a massive fan of Go Fug Yourself, because celebrities in insane clothing is one of the highlights of life in this bleak and confusing world, where even the lyrics to childhood shows betray you. But you all need to go vote for SWINTON, because she is a sheer delight, and knows the secrets of the universe, and Katy Perry is so twee and toolish that she makes me cross. And I still haven't heard her big hit song. Full points for LV!* Oh, Zack Snyder. This sounds an awful lot like Robert Rodriguez's ode to his homewrecking face-melting fiancee. But I like you a lot more than Rodriguez, and you don't insist on wearing a cowboy hat everywhere, and also you introduced me to Richard Cheese, so I will give you the benefit of the doubt. Also, Watchmen.* Dear God, what is this wonder? Ron Perlman is badass in a robe.* The Onion has really outdone itself with its record of Obama's First Hundred Days.* This made me laugh, for obvious reasons. Plagiarism is FUNNY.* And finally, for all your Trekkies out there (I am a sekrit card-carrying Trekkie, and am deeply fond of both Spock and Data, and all good fandoms, so I sympathize with you and support you, in SEKRIT), here are some pictures from the upcoming movie, which will probably but the Watchmen mania to shame. This one makes me all hapy, because Zachary Quinto and his Amazing Eyebrows are glorious, and he was my second favorite on 'Heroes' before I got confused and gave up: * OK. Need to get ready and go do shit. INK.- LV
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