Blog* Arnold Rimmer, selfish smeghead, I love you. Title is from Red Dwarf.Halloween* This is only quasi-Halloween-related, but it's a recipe for pumpkin bread. I love pumpkin bread. AND AND this recipe has no raisins in it, which is good, because raisins are the most evil of all the fruit.* Your Halloween decorations should NOT contain real human bits:[Found at Regretsy]Just saying. And you shouldn't get defensive when people find your use of human bits as decoration a little freakish. Hey, I do.* Like every child of a certain age, I loved R.L. Stine's Goosebumps books. They were fun and creepy and terrible, terrible books that I would never admit to reading in public. But if I was home sick, I had a STACK of them beside me. Here are some of the best, before they inexplicably made a funny version, and a Choose-Your-Own-Adventure version, which I DO NOT APPROVE OF.* Those of you that read my personal blog (and why aren't the rest of you? It has PICTURES and MUSIC) know that yesterday I decided to be a steampunk zombie hunter for Halloween. Steampunk aspect will be cobbled together, and depends very much on finding a corset. The zombie hunter regalia is inspired by this godlike creature:[Found at Digitally Blonde]I BOUGHT THAT HAT, PEOPLE. The details of the costume, and it's construction, are at my blog, and I'm not repeating it all here. But for those of you NAYSAYERS who doubt that steampunk and Tallahassee can mix, I LAUGH in your face and go off to find Twinkies.I still can't seem to find a knife sheath. That worries me.Apocalypse How?* Oh, look, it's a robot that dances and does chores for you, with a smile:[Found at DVICE]Nope, NOTHING bad will come of this. The robot won' serve you your HEAD on a PLATTER. Nope, no worries HERE. What? The shotgun? It's a... a precaution. Against bugs.Epic!Fail* Good News: People still do buy books. Bad News? These are the books we're reading:[Found at Wonkette]I don't have to LIKE the books you're reading, but could they at least not conclusively LOWER your IQ every time you see the cover. DAN BROWN CAN'T WRITE. Now if you need me, I'll be snuggling my own unpublished manuscript and banging my head against a wall. COULD EVERYONE JUST GO BUY A WILL CHRISTOPHER BAER BOOK? FOR ME?Books* As if Wednesdays aren't depressing enough (and really, is it STILL pouring out? Can't it just settle for moody and overcast?), here's an interactive map of banned books. Like, recently banned books. Books banned THIS YEAR. We, in America, still ban books for being offensive. And RIP OUT THE PAGES. This shouldn't surprise me, but it DOES, and now I'm sad. Even Dan Brown doesn't deserve that. Even STEPHENIE MEYERS doesn't deserve that shit. I get pissy when people use books as doorstops. I catch you HURTING a book, shit is going DOWN.Oh, god, I just read this PDF of books banned this year. There's one for last year too. WHAT THE FUCK? YOU DO NOT BAN THE GIVER. EVER. FUCK THAT. I AM ANGRY NOW.Daily Hot Guy* So I'm pretty sure Eli Roth is a total jackass. And the Hostel movies are excrement. I am AWARE of these facts:[Eli Roth, director of Cabin Fever, the Jew Bear in Inglourious Basterds, and a friend of Quentin Tarantino. That's why I like him. And his trailer in Grindhouse CRACKED ME UP. And he's hot, in a smug asshole sort of way, RIGHT?]Childhood!Fail* They're making a Barbie movie. I didn't even like Barbie when I was supposed to (she did get eaten by my toy dinosaurs regularly, or trampled by my herd of model horses.... why are you all looking at me like that?The only bright spot in what will surely be an offensive, idiotic journey down memory lane is that in recent commercials they've used the 'Barbie Girl' song by Aqua, which makes fun of Barbie, so maybe the whole film will be a parade of misunderstood pop culture references. I'd enjoy that.Late for work.- LV
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