Blog* Man, I can wait for the beefs to be jerkied. Title is from The Daily Show.Awesome - Quasi New Category!* This is basically stuff I can't label any other way, but I want to talk about. LIKE THIS: Did you know swearing mitigates pain? YES. Science hasn't failed us! Swearing makes pain less traumatic, and allows us to endure it for longer. So swear. SWEAR UNTIL YOUR TONGUE RUPTURES! I won't lie, I just like cursing. It adds some spice to any conversation. Who isn't charmed when the person they're conversing with starts talking about 'motherfucking taxes'? That's classy.Star TrekI'm not going to lie, this may be the reason I had a soul-crushing sinus headache all day yesterday. [Found at ONTD_StarTrek]Coffee lodged in one's nasal cavity is never pleasant. On the upside, we now know why
is allowed to exist. There are more here. Including a saucy Chekov one that I nearly posted, but Spock wins forever. All that aside, keep your Twilight out of my Star Trek. Or I'll have Kirk stab you in the face. I can do that.WTF, INTERNET?* Internet we need to talk. I accept the fact that you show me stupid, inexplicable, offensive, baffling shit on a daily basis. It is why I love you. Ours is an unhealthy relationship. But every once in a while, something so MORONIC appears across my browser that I almost don't want to deal with it:[Found at NerdApproved]This is a moose clipboard. A moose clipboard. I am sure Sarah Palin has fifty in different colors. But let's stop and think about this. Someone was holding a regular, innocent clipboard. They looked at it. They had a thought. That thought was, 'Gee, this clipboard needs more MOOSE in it.' What is going ON? This isn't nearly as weird as half the shit I post in this category, but it makes NO SENSE. THERE IS NO CONNECTION BETWEEN MOOSE AND CLIPBOARDS. NO CONNECTION AT ALL. Why this bothers me more than, I don't know, people dressing up as ducks and beating each other with raw hunks of meat, is probably something we shouldn't delve into. Maybe because that is so weird that it's comfortably out of the realm of my world. But a moose clipboard? You KNOW that something sinister is lurking in the mind of its creator.Movie!Win* IT's OK. IT IS OK. EVERYONE STOP PANICKING. THEY ARE NOT MAKING THE HEATHERS SEQUEL. LET'S NEVER SPEAK OF THIS HIDEOUS MOMENT IN OUR CULTURE EVER AGAIN, OK?Animals* I would like to announce, here, the founding of the ElleVee Memorial Goat Tower:[Found at BoingBoing]True, I am not dead, have no goats, and when I built a gingerbread house with my brother the cookie people were smothered to death in the wreckage, but LOOK HOW HAPPY THE GOATS ARE. HERE, GOATY GOATY GOATY.Daily Hot Guy* DUDE.[Alan Rickman as Professor Severus Snape. How sick is it that I want him to glare at me and tell me my personal and intellectual failings? Please don't answer that.]Apocalypse How?* If you are depressed, frightened about the future, confused about the world, or otherwise perturbed about what lies ahead of us as a species, do not watch this video of Bruce Sterling:"Man is indeed wise and brilliant, but not the person you want to call to get someone off the ledge. "You can jump, or you can walk away into the UNKNOWN, the NOTHING of the future." "Please stop talking. He jumped an hour ago." "FUUUUTTTUUUUURRREEEE."Harry Potter* If you're going to make fun, or roll your eyes, you can screw right off. I love it, it's FUN, the books are well-written, and nobody SPARKLES or makes thinly-veiled abstinence statements or undermines women or can rip you in two with their SEX, so I win. Anyway, as much as I love all my fandoms, there are things that are not OK. Like Rorschach thongs. And while I appreciate other people who never lost faith in Snape (and for those of you who did, you FAIL at LIFE), this is sort of undermining the beauty and tragedy of the character:I mean, Snape would burn you ALIVE if he saw that. And you'd DESERVE it. This is also not OK:TRAGIC, MISUNDERSTOOD CHARACTER. This is like me getting a mug that said, 'Walter is OK with me!' NO. STOP MISINTERPRETING THE CHARACTER. Also, don't call him Severus. If you called Rorschach 'Walter,' you'd have ten broken fingers AND an intimate knowledge of a nearby elevator shaft. Anyway, calling him 'Severus' is about an inch away from calling him 'Sevvie,' and I don't have enough bandwith to tell you how wrong that is.This just made me scream:If you are trying to hug the Potions Master, you must have read a different book series. Because the Potions Master I know and love is kind of a sick, unhappy person who does not go around HUGGING.Doesn't the writing on this look like
? I can't... I HAVE A FANDOM TATTOO, AND YET I WOULD NOT WEAR THIS SHIRT. WHAT DOES THAT SAY?I won't lie. I would see this movie. Hundred's of times. I want to watch him make flight attendants cry.Here's a fun little clip on how all the stuff I just showed you has DAMNED YOU TO HELL. HAHAHAHAHA.And, finally, here are two reviews of the new movie. This one can't believe it's rated PG. (Neither can I, having read the books.) This one is a Wired review. If Wired doesn't mock it, it's beyond reproach.Yes, I'm seeing the movie tonight. Yes I'm a little excited. Yes, I'm wearing green. What? Slytherin PWNS you all. Words Of Win[Found at Indexed]OK, need to go to the pharmacy. Because, as atonement for having a week filled with Watchmen: The Director's Cut AND Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, I am being forced to suffer a sinus headache so bad I threw up yesterday, and cried, and slept a lot. So Tylenol is in order. A LOT of Tylenol. Also, and completely unrelated, there is a circle of hell reserved specially for people who make you wait an hour and a half for a five minute doctor's appointment. Just saying.- LV
is allowed to exist. There are more here. Including a saucy Chekov one that I nearly posted, but Spock wins forever. All that aside, keep your Twilight out of my Star Trek. Or I'll have Kirk stab you in the face. I can do that.WTF, INTERNET?* Internet we need to talk. I accept the fact that you show me stupid, inexplicable, offensive, baffling shit on a daily basis. It is why I love you. Ours is an unhealthy relationship. But every once in a while, something so MORONIC appears across my browser that I almost don't want to deal with it:[Found at NerdApproved]This is a moose clipboard. A moose clipboard. I am sure Sarah Palin has fifty in different colors. But let's stop and think about this. Someone was holding a regular, innocent clipboard. They looked at it. They had a thought. That thought was, 'Gee, this clipboard needs more MOOSE in it.' What is going ON? This isn't nearly as weird as half the shit I post in this category, but it makes NO SENSE. THERE IS NO CONNECTION BETWEEN MOOSE AND CLIPBOARDS. NO CONNECTION AT ALL. Why this bothers me more than, I don't know, people dressing up as ducks and beating each other with raw hunks of meat, is probably something we shouldn't delve into. Maybe because that is so weird that it's comfortably out of the realm of my world. But a moose clipboard? You KNOW that something sinister is lurking in the mind of its creator.Movie!Win* IT's OK. IT IS OK. EVERYONE STOP PANICKING. THEY ARE NOT MAKING THE HEATHERS SEQUEL. LET'S NEVER SPEAK OF THIS HIDEOUS MOMENT IN OUR CULTURE EVER AGAIN, OK?Animals* I would like to announce, here, the founding of the ElleVee Memorial Goat Tower:[Found at BoingBoing]True, I am not dead, have no goats, and when I built a gingerbread house with my brother the cookie people were smothered to death in the wreckage, but LOOK HOW HAPPY THE GOATS ARE. HERE, GOATY GOATY GOATY.Daily Hot Guy* DUDE.[Alan Rickman as Professor Severus Snape. How sick is it that I want him to glare at me and tell me my personal and intellectual failings? Please don't answer that.]Apocalypse How?* If you are depressed, frightened about the future, confused about the world, or otherwise perturbed about what lies ahead of us as a species, do not watch this video of Bruce Sterling:"Man is indeed wise and brilliant, but not the person you want to call to get someone off the ledge. "You can jump, or you can walk away into the UNKNOWN, the NOTHING of the future." "Please stop talking. He jumped an hour ago." "FUUUUTTTUUUUURRREEEE."Harry Potter* If you're going to make fun, or roll your eyes, you can screw right off. I love it, it's FUN, the books are well-written, and nobody SPARKLES or makes thinly-veiled abstinence statements or undermines women or can rip you in two with their SEX, so I win. Anyway, as much as I love all my fandoms, there are things that are not OK. Like Rorschach thongs. And while I appreciate other people who never lost faith in Snape (and for those of you who did, you FAIL at LIFE), this is sort of undermining the beauty and tragedy of the character:I mean, Snape would burn you ALIVE if he saw that. And you'd DESERVE it. This is also not OK:TRAGIC, MISUNDERSTOOD CHARACTER. This is like me getting a mug that said, 'Walter is OK with me!' NO. STOP MISINTERPRETING THE CHARACTER. Also, don't call him Severus. If you called Rorschach 'Walter,' you'd have ten broken fingers AND an intimate knowledge of a nearby elevator shaft. Anyway, calling him 'Severus' is about an inch away from calling him 'Sevvie,' and I don't have enough bandwith to tell you how wrong that is.This just made me scream:If you are trying to hug the Potions Master, you must have read a different book series. Because the Potions Master I know and love is kind of a sick, unhappy person who does not go around HUGGING.Doesn't the writing on this look like
? I can't... I HAVE A FANDOM TATTOO, AND YET I WOULD NOT WEAR THIS SHIRT. WHAT DOES THAT SAY?I won't lie. I would see this movie. Hundred's of times. I want to watch him make flight attendants cry.Here's a fun little clip on how all the stuff I just showed you has DAMNED YOU TO HELL. HAHAHAHAHA.And, finally, here are two reviews of the new movie. This one can't believe it's rated PG. (Neither can I, having read the books.) This one is a Wired review. If Wired doesn't mock it, it's beyond reproach.Yes, I'm seeing the movie tonight. Yes I'm a little excited. Yes, I'm wearing green. What? Slytherin PWNS you all. Words Of Win[Found at Indexed]OK, need to go to the pharmacy. Because, as atonement for having a week filled with Watchmen: The Director's Cut AND Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, I am being forced to suffer a sinus headache so bad I threw up yesterday, and cried, and slept a lot. So Tylenol is in order. A LOT of Tylenol. Also, and completely unrelated, there is a circle of hell reserved specially for people who make you wait an hour and a half for a five minute doctor's appointment. Just saying.- LV
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