Blog
* Wash, you are an endless source of delight. Title is from Firefly.
Watchmen
* So I am insane about the fact that Watchmen: The Director's Cut is only coming out with all the special features in Blu-Ray, which I DO NOT HAVE AND CANNOT AFFORD, ZACK SNYDER. I SAW THE MOVIE FOUR TIMES IN THEATERS. I MADE EVERYONE I KNOW GO SEE IT. I HAVE A RORSCHACH TATTOO. I WIN. YOU FAIL. LET ME SEE THIS MOVIE. Ahem. Anyway, apparently at Comic-Con they're going to show the Director's Cut, and you can watch it online and then ask Zack Snyder questions, and all mine will be about WHY DO YOU HATE THOSE OF US WITHOUT BLU-RAY?
Tattoo Of Win
* This is not sarcastic or snarky, because these tattoos are beautiful:
[Found at Neatorama]
They're supposed to look like crayon drawings, and I think they're quite lovely. Designs by Yann Travaille, who should design a Hunter Thompson tattoo for me that isn't masculine, and then tattoo me for free, because I am cheap.
Food
* Screw the candies, which I am sure are disgusting and look like they have that dusty shit I DESPISE, and just give me the amazering holders:
[Found at Geekologie]
I want to use these things to hold makeup and change and drugs. What? WHAT? Pac-Man never said no. To ANYTHING.
Comics
* See, I am excited about The Good, The Bad, & The Ugly comic. But I'm also worried. Because The Man With No Name is a force of nature, and if you screw up his tale, he will hunt you down. It doesn't matter where you go or how far you run. He will follow, always, and he will find you, and then he will BURY YOU ALIVE, which sucks. But I had nothing to do with the comic, so I simply will look forward to this comic, which is written by Chuck Dixon. I may not buy it, because the cover irritates me in a nonspecific way, but I always like a good Western. Then again, I like total and insane violence, too, so I may not be the best barometer for, well, anything.
Words Of Win
see more Fail Blog
YouTube Wonders
* This is a short video of a cute baby snuggling with a cute puppy. It's Monday. Don't push it.
\
Books
* James Joyce rules. Here is a recording of him reading a section of Finnegan's Wake. It's OK if you don't always understand what Joyce is talking about. He's a writer whose words flow over you. Like fine wine. That you bathe in. Yes, I bathe in wine. Constantly.
Vampires
* Last night I finished the rough draft of my Epic Vampire Novel of Dubious Quality (except for the epilogue, which I have written in my head but have yet to put on paper). I also learned that I'm an idiot, but that's a daily discovery. To celebrate the rough draft being (essentially) finished, here is a guide to other vampire worlds of True Blood, Angel, and that Sparkly Vampire Franchise. Notice that the ones that DON'T suck also DON'T sparkle. And sparkle and suck start with the same letter, so airtight logic, Twilight FAILS.
People I Love
* Here is a video of Russell Brand. I am going to be a Brandystripper. It is my Calling. Do not question my life choices.
Remake!Fail
* How wrong is it that I am sort of thrilled by the upcoming disaster of the Spiderman Musical? It cannot be good. It just CAN'T. Spiderman is not MEANT to be in musical for? But I want to go, and see it, despite the fact that I loathe Bono AND Evan Rachel Wood. Alan Cumming as Green Goblin is inspired (although why isn't Willem Dafoe doing it? Can he sing? I'd pay to see him try), so that's one positive. Personally I'm hoping they can't get Jim Sturgess to play Spidey, because while I think he's talented and gorgeous and maybe have a little thing for him, I want them to miscast the role. I want Ashton Kutcher to play Spidey. YES. Can you IMAGINE? The stage would collapse under the weight of such horrors. And Alan Cumming would jump to safety, and Evan Rachel Wood would do something disgusting and get accolades for a great movie just because she didn't ruin it, and Ashton Kutcher would Tweet about how nobody understands his genius, the end.
Depression Session
* What do you do when you've destroyed the ozone layer AND you're broke because you spent all your money on tickets for the new Spiderman Musical, and now it's summer and the sun is burning through your delicate flesh? Make your own sunblock, and remember the days before the world was doomed to hell. Or just stay indoors, like me. Away from the sun. IT BURNS US. Or you could pretend you're an earth mother/father who loves to be economical and homey, and pretend that the economic collapse has NOTHING to do with your decisions. Nothing at all.
TeeVee
* Remember when the networks weren't afraid of freaking out kids? And they showed stuff that was actually frightening, as scary shows should be? I miss Are You Afraid of the Dark. And Snick. That whole night was epic. Space Cases, anyone? Jewel Staite for the win! But Are You Afraid of the Dark will always be special. It scared the everloving shit out of me regularly, and assured everyone that I'd spend the night crying in the corner of my room with every light blazing, convinced I was going to die a hideous TV-14 death.
Now I love horror movies. I have seen hundreds of the most twisted, deviant films out there (Poughkeepsie Tapes, anyone? Bueller?) But just looking at the pictures of these '35 Creepiest Are You Afraid of the Dark? Characters' brought back an almost physical reaction. Zeebo the clown?
You KNOW my clown issues. In fact, by posting this picture, I can no longer look at my own blog. I had to close my eyes while I copied and pasted.
The little boy who kept saying, 'I'm cold?'
GOD DAMN. And you see that mummy?
That mummy is the reason why, for MOST of my childhood, I would not sleep with my back to the door. EVER. So let us reminisce about the scary things that go bump in the night, and wonder aloud as to WHY THE HELL this show isn't on DVD. BECAUSE IT IS NOT. I HAVE LOOKED.
Journalism
* I do not like CNN. I miss MSNBC, but since we switched over our TV service, we can't get it. I miss Keith Olbermann yelling at me through the TV, and Pat Buchanan screaming and predicting doom. I miss my friends. But CNN does have moments of jaw-dropping stupidity that make me laugh, in terror. This whole piece on CNN blathering about how important Twitter is while completely and utterly ignoring people Tweeting about the Iranian election and effectively using the social network to get attention to an issue is funny. You have to laugh. Because these people are paid to do these things.
Look, Twitter is not perfect. It is deeply flawed (and fuck whoever started those rumors about Jeff Goldblum being dead, THAT WAS MEAN), but if you know how to weed through the bullshit, it can be unbelievably useful. This morning, Twitter told me Robert S. McNamera was dead a full half an hour before I saw it on the news. And while I would like some journalists to use Twitter (not just Tweet news stories for their networks, actually USE IT), it's a new source of information, and CNN is just scared shitless.
Then again, MSNBC uttered this line of Epic, Soul-Crushing Fail:
So maybe I should stop watching news on TV. For my health.
Wow
* I want to go to a Banksy show. Even though he revealed himself to not be a ninja. Not that I was hoping for that at all. Um, here's a BBC video of his show. Which features no ninjas.
Daily Hot Guy
[Chris Pine AKA Captain James Tiberius Kirk, making me lust after the Captain for the first time in Star Trek history, although my heart belongs to Spock, and Data, for always]
Today I finish writing a book. The first draft. Second draft will destroy what remains of my delicate sanity. Talk amongst yourselves.
- LV
* Wash, you are an endless source of delight. Title is from Firefly.
Watchmen
* So I am insane about the fact that Watchmen: The Director's Cut is only coming out with all the special features in Blu-Ray, which I DO NOT HAVE AND CANNOT AFFORD, ZACK SNYDER. I SAW THE MOVIE FOUR TIMES IN THEATERS. I MADE EVERYONE I KNOW GO SEE IT. I HAVE A RORSCHACH TATTOO. I WIN. YOU FAIL. LET ME SEE THIS MOVIE. Ahem. Anyway, apparently at Comic-Con they're going to show the Director's Cut, and you can watch it online and then ask Zack Snyder questions, and all mine will be about WHY DO YOU HATE THOSE OF US WITHOUT BLU-RAY?
Tattoo Of Win
* This is not sarcastic or snarky, because these tattoos are beautiful:
[Found at Neatorama]
They're supposed to look like crayon drawings, and I think they're quite lovely. Designs by Yann Travaille, who should design a Hunter Thompson tattoo for me that isn't masculine, and then tattoo me for free, because I am cheap.
Food
* Screw the candies, which I am sure are disgusting and look like they have that dusty shit I DESPISE, and just give me the amazering holders:
[Found at Geekologie]
I want to use these things to hold makeup and change and drugs. What? WHAT? Pac-Man never said no. To ANYTHING.
Comics
* See, I am excited about The Good, The Bad, & The Ugly comic. But I'm also worried. Because The Man With No Name is a force of nature, and if you screw up his tale, he will hunt you down. It doesn't matter where you go or how far you run. He will follow, always, and he will find you, and then he will BURY YOU ALIVE, which sucks. But I had nothing to do with the comic, so I simply will look forward to this comic, which is written by Chuck Dixon. I may not buy it, because the cover irritates me in a nonspecific way, but I always like a good Western. Then again, I like total and insane violence, too, so I may not be the best barometer for, well, anything.
Words Of Win
see more Fail Blog
YouTube Wonders
* This is a short video of a cute baby snuggling with a cute puppy. It's Monday. Don't push it.
\
Books
* James Joyce rules. Here is a recording of him reading a section of Finnegan's Wake. It's OK if you don't always understand what Joyce is talking about. He's a writer whose words flow over you. Like fine wine. That you bathe in. Yes, I bathe in wine. Constantly.
Vampires
* Last night I finished the rough draft of my Epic Vampire Novel of Dubious Quality (except for the epilogue, which I have written in my head but have yet to put on paper). I also learned that I'm an idiot, but that's a daily discovery. To celebrate the rough draft being (essentially) finished, here is a guide to other vampire worlds of True Blood, Angel, and that Sparkly Vampire Franchise. Notice that the ones that DON'T suck also DON'T sparkle. And sparkle and suck start with the same letter, so airtight logic, Twilight FAILS.
People I Love
* Here is a video of Russell Brand. I am going to be a Brandystripper. It is my Calling. Do not question my life choices.
Remake!Fail
* How wrong is it that I am sort of thrilled by the upcoming disaster of the Spiderman Musical? It cannot be good. It just CAN'T. Spiderman is not MEANT to be in musical for? But I want to go, and see it, despite the fact that I loathe Bono AND Evan Rachel Wood. Alan Cumming as Green Goblin is inspired (although why isn't Willem Dafoe doing it? Can he sing? I'd pay to see him try), so that's one positive. Personally I'm hoping they can't get Jim Sturgess to play Spidey, because while I think he's talented and gorgeous and maybe have a little thing for him, I want them to miscast the role. I want Ashton Kutcher to play Spidey. YES. Can you IMAGINE? The stage would collapse under the weight of such horrors. And Alan Cumming would jump to safety, and Evan Rachel Wood would do something disgusting and get accolades for a great movie just because she didn't ruin it, and Ashton Kutcher would Tweet about how nobody understands his genius, the end.
Depression Session
* What do you do when you've destroyed the ozone layer AND you're broke because you spent all your money on tickets for the new Spiderman Musical, and now it's summer and the sun is burning through your delicate flesh? Make your own sunblock, and remember the days before the world was doomed to hell. Or just stay indoors, like me. Away from the sun. IT BURNS US. Or you could pretend you're an earth mother/father who loves to be economical and homey, and pretend that the economic collapse has NOTHING to do with your decisions. Nothing at all.
TeeVee
* Remember when the networks weren't afraid of freaking out kids? And they showed stuff that was actually frightening, as scary shows should be? I miss Are You Afraid of the Dark. And Snick. That whole night was epic. Space Cases, anyone? Jewel Staite for the win! But Are You Afraid of the Dark will always be special. It scared the everloving shit out of me regularly, and assured everyone that I'd spend the night crying in the corner of my room with every light blazing, convinced I was going to die a hideous TV-14 death.
Now I love horror movies. I have seen hundreds of the most twisted, deviant films out there (Poughkeepsie Tapes, anyone? Bueller?) But just looking at the pictures of these '35 Creepiest Are You Afraid of the Dark? Characters' brought back an almost physical reaction. Zeebo the clown?
You KNOW my clown issues. In fact, by posting this picture, I can no longer look at my own blog. I had to close my eyes while I copied and pasted.
The little boy who kept saying, 'I'm cold?'
GOD DAMN. And you see that mummy?
That mummy is the reason why, for MOST of my childhood, I would not sleep with my back to the door. EVER. So let us reminisce about the scary things that go bump in the night, and wonder aloud as to WHY THE HELL this show isn't on DVD. BECAUSE IT IS NOT. I HAVE LOOKED.
Journalism
* I do not like CNN. I miss MSNBC, but since we switched over our TV service, we can't get it. I miss Keith Olbermann yelling at me through the TV, and Pat Buchanan screaming and predicting doom. I miss my friends. But CNN does have moments of jaw-dropping stupidity that make me laugh, in terror. This whole piece on CNN blathering about how important Twitter is while completely and utterly ignoring people Tweeting about the Iranian election and effectively using the social network to get attention to an issue is funny. You have to laugh. Because these people are paid to do these things.
Look, Twitter is not perfect. It is deeply flawed (and fuck whoever started those rumors about Jeff Goldblum being dead, THAT WAS MEAN), but if you know how to weed through the bullshit, it can be unbelievably useful. This morning, Twitter told me Robert S. McNamera was dead a full half an hour before I saw it on the news. And while I would like some journalists to use Twitter (not just Tweet news stories for their networks, actually USE IT), it's a new source of information, and CNN is just scared shitless.
Then again, MSNBC uttered this line of Epic, Soul-Crushing Fail:
So maybe I should stop watching news on TV. For my health.
Wow
* I want to go to a Banksy show. Even though he revealed himself to not be a ninja. Not that I was hoping for that at all. Um, here's a BBC video of his show. Which features no ninjas.
Daily Hot Guy
[Chris Pine AKA Captain James Tiberius Kirk, making me lust after the Captain for the first time in Star Trek history, although my heart belongs to Spock, and Data, for always]
Today I finish writing a book. The first draft. Second draft will destroy what remains of my delicate sanity. Talk amongst yourselves.
- LV
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