Asking Someone To Repeat A Phrase You'd Not Only Heard Very Clearly But Were Also Exceedingly Angry About Was Around Defcon II In The Lexicon Of Squabble.Blog* Title comes from the pen of Terry Pratchett in his wonderful book, Witches Abroad. I wish I lived on Discworld. I'd probably die quickly and messily, but at least it would be interesting.YouTube Wonders* Once again, this is entirely Julie's fault. How she finds these things in between keeping Earth safe from asteroids and fighting the vampire hordes, I do not know:I'm also fairly certain I only posted this because it involves bacon, and the lame joy bacon brings into all our lives. Because bacon bits are mana from heaven.Depression Session* Before money becomes a thing of the past and you are trading your youngest child for a tube of Pringles, here are some meals you can make for under $2.00. They are shockingly tasty-looking. I am intrigued. Also, this way you can keep your children fit and healthy for as long as possible. Perhaps they will be worth TWO tubes of Pringles. Russell Brand* Here is a video clip of Russell talking about his hair. Ask me how sexy I find him. ASK ME. You don't want to know, probably, but the answer is INDESCRIBABLY. And he's smart as hell, too. Smarter than me, who spends way too much time online yelling about how attractive Mr. Brand is. Girly Shit* I have a complex and stilted relationship with Urban Outfitters. On one hand, I love some of their stuff, and they used to have these tiny sheep me and my friends collected that we called Lamb-Ram, and I still have a herd of these awesome tiny sheep in a bag somewhere, and I really should go find them, because they are tiny and multi-colored and ADORABLE.On the other hand, Urban Outfitters is overpriced and fairly pretentious and has some truly inexplicable fashion choices (anyone remember the post where I nearly blacked out from rage over the ugliest shoes, ever?)[Found at Jezebel]MC Hammer called. He wants his pants back. And probably that joke. And his big solid-gold mansion. But really, those pants make me weep for the future of fashion. If it comes down to Lady Gaga's no-pants look or these pants, I will go pantsless. And I am violently opposed to exposed unmentionables. That is how much I hate these pants. And there are more ugly things here.Music* Shakira is one of those cases where I like her as a person (what I know from the media, obviously. I will not pretend to know Shakira personally. I assume that she could secretly eat kittens and flay orphans, although that seems unlikely. But from what I read/hear/see she seems like a lovely individual) much more than I like her music (except for that song 'Objection,' because I had just broken up with a boyfriend when that song came out and it made me feel bad-ass to sing along in my car to that song as I sobbed teenage tears of angst and misery). Shakira is short and curvy and has great hair, and she's sexy without seeming like a tramp, and she went to college despite being disgustingly rich and she can do that hip-thing I can't. Believe me, I've tried. Also I hate her for being able to dance so well, when I can barely walk. But I forgive her, becauseshe's also doing a lot of good things, for charities and children and the world, and unlike Bono I don't want to throttle her for being a pretentious fraud. So yay Shakira. Tell me your hair secrets. And short people rule the world, for always.And here's the video for 'Objection,' because now it's stuck in my head:Technology* OHMIGODOHMIGODOHMIGOD. THIS:[Found at LikeCool]Turns into THIS:[Found at LikeCool]IT'S A THREE-WHEEL FLYING MOTORCYCLE. And it will be available to people like me. EVERYONE CAN HAVE ONE. I need to learn how to ride a motorcycle of ANY kind, now. Because I need one of these. I'm going to FLY everywhere. Even though I'm afraid of planes. I won't be afraid of this, though, because knowing me I'll never go more than ten feet off the ground. Oh, yes I will. I will be badass on this flying motorcycle, and maybe throw things at the house of Bill O'Reilly and then FLY away. This will be like the Jetsons only BETTER. Bring on the technology! Daily Hot Guy[David Tennant as the Tenth Doctor, who is apparently leaving us for Masterpiece Theatre, which makes me cry even more, although I would personally find it very sexy to watch him play Hamlet]Watchmen* This is a very good toy model thing of Silk Spectre II:[Found at WatchmenComicMovie]And it comes with her trenchcoat, to cover up her revealing outfit that upset many respectable vigilantes. But I am not going to lie to you. Until I get a tiny Walter Kovacs with removable mask and sign and tiny purple gloves and a fedora and the tiny green MOVIE!GLOVES that spawned an entire fandom of love, I will not be happy. Also, it should come with a grappling hook, and a wee doggie whose head you can split. And microscopic sugar cubes. And a bottle of Nostalgia. And a wilted rose. THESE ARE NECESSARY. Yet the toy company will not return my many helpful calls. Their loss.Ads* This is the reason - the ONLY reason - why I threw out ever bottle of my 11-year-old brother's Axe shampoo/body wash:[Found at SociologicalImages]My brother is ELEVEN. ELEVEN. He still watches Spongebob and is just starting to think that maybe, possibly, some girls aren't THAT gross. He finds balls hilarious (OK, I think that's all guys, ever). He has nightmares and stuffed animals. He is a little kid. Ergo, I refuse to have to sit down and explain an incestuous threesome to him. I WILL NOT DO THIS. I HAVE THE LSATS ON MONDAY. I AM STRESSED OUT ALL TO HELL. I should not have to explain this ad. Although I suspect I will have to use it to justify to my mother why we can no longer purchase Axe products for a small boy.Words of Win* This is from New Jersey:[Found by a loyal reader]Yeah, I offer no explanations for my state. Click it to embiggen it, and read my East Coast shame.Tattoo Of Win* I cannot remember if I have posted this before. I suspect I have. But I do not care, because tattoos on your toes will always be funny, and I once drew a bunch of smiley-faces on the bottoms of my toes, stuck my foot in my friend's face, and giggling, told her, 'LOOK! THEY'RE HAPPY TO SEE YOU!' I hadn't slept in two days, and had a serious Red Bull problem. Leave me be. These toes are not as happy:[Found at LOLTATZ]More later. I have to go drive to the LSAT testing center so I can find it on actual testing day and not have a breakdown that ends in the unwise purchase of a flamethrower.- LV
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