Sunday, June 7, 2009

What's Spanish For 'I Know You Speak English?'

Blog
* Title is from Arrested Development, and Lucille Bluth displaying her sensitivity for other cultures.

Food
* Food is wonderful. We here at Fear and Loathing are big fans of food, and encourage it to be eaten often and with great pleasure. Did you know that some foods are good for you? I hope so, because otherwise the Food Pyramid people will be very depressed. Here are 33 foods that will save your ass. Did you know that cranberries are like the food of the saints? And I eat Craisins every morning? I am so wise.

Comics
* Grant Morrison has long been a favorite writer of mine. I adore him. So I am very happy that his new take on Batman and Robin is getting such great reviews, and I will buy it as soon as I have money that I do not unwisely spend on haircare products and computer games. Which will likely be this week, unless I am especially stupid. This is possible. Anyway, in the meantime, here's an interview with Morrison, who I love, and a peek at how his brain works. It's kind of remarkable.

Moment Of Win

[Found at Friggin Random]

Movies
* Nathan Fillion FTW. I know everyone has seen this a thousand times, but it's Sunday and I wanted to watch it again and again, in the desperate hope that the universe will make this a reality, and I can start to LIVE AGAIN:


Stupid People
* When you think of SWAT teams, you do not think of tiny pre-pubescent boys with a thing for Pokemon, or whatever the hell children are into these days. I don't know, my brother likes those Halo games and baseball. And let me assure you, his friends who are in the Boy Scouts are not qualified to take down terrorists. No amount of training will cause a group of little boys who refer to their junk as 'GameCubes' to become a fearless crime-fighting team. So no, I will not be supporting the Boy Scouts SWAT team, or their efforts to keep America safe. Because, seriously, this is going to end badly. They are trained to take down 'active shooters' and KILL people. BOY SCOUTS. WTF.

Books
* Boing Boing has an excellent link to a superb horror podcast by David Nickle that gave me nightmares. Maybe because I'm stressed about the LSATs, but I've been having WEIRD nightmares all week. In one, I was with the team of Torchwood, and we were looking for Captain Jack, and everyone was dead but me and Ianto and Gwen, and I think I was trying to get with Ianto, but all the death kept ruining my smooth man-eating skillz. Anyway, this is a scary story that all horror fans will enjoy. Click the link to click ANOTHER link.

Daily Hot Guy

[Hugh Laurie and a motorcycle. If you add a crying unicorn and an angry toaster, you get my dream from last night]

Star Trek
* I love Star Trek fans:

[Found at Neatorama]
And I love this oven mitt, so MUCH. I love everything. This is a happy category. Hugs and Romulan ale and cookies for ALL.

Remake!Fail
* VINDICATION! I WAS RIGHT. HAHA. Let me GLOAT over my success in the failure of others. And my self-righteous HATE of bad remakes. What am I snarking about? The Land of the Lost remake is being called the first summer bomb of 2009. My theory on why it only reached a tragic third? Well, besides the obvious point that the two top-placing movies got unbelievably good reviews, people would either A) Not be fans of the TV show and have no idea what was going on, or why Will Ferrell was screaming at everyone, or B) Be huge fans of the TV show and find the while enterprise disgusting and refuse to find out why Will Ferrell was screaming at everyone. Remake Fail VINDICATION.

TeeVee
* This interview with Anna Friel about the end of Pushing Daises actually made me SAD. Because I loved the show and knew it was doomed because it was funny and smart and sweet and brilliant, and that means it will die a sad death. And I know it's going to be a comic and I am DELIGHTED by that, but dammit it's NOT THE SAME. So only read this interview if you are especially tough, or have NO SOUL, and were the one behind canceling the show. ABC is now just behind FOX on the ladder of TV Networks That Fail.

Journalism
* It's sad that I tend to turn to The Daily Show as an actual news source, because the people on CNN are largely insane and the people on MSNBC are alternately quite brilliant or hiding a disgusting past, and FOX is everything I hate about journalism. Also Bill O'Reilly makes me want to kick blind kittens. But The Daily Show's analysis of Obama's Egypt speech (as they call it) is quite prescient. So maybe I can ignore the fact that Jon Stewart was in Death To Smoochy - at least for the length of the clip. Actually, there are TWO clips in this link, because I love you all.

Geek Want
* Lately Fear and Loathing has moved from toilet coverage to salt and pepper shaker coverage. Or it will, for a while, because so many of the links in my Bookmarks are about shakers. Which is fabulous, so long as they continue to be as adorable and charming as these:

[Found at DVICE]
They are so CUTE. And they solve that obnoxious issue of never knowing how much salt/pepper is in the shaker. Unfortunately (you KNEW this was coming - this entry has been alarmingly perky) they are not for sale yet, because the evil Spice Industry wants us to never know how much salt and pepper we have less, thus dooming as all to a lifetime of misery and darkness.

Furniture
* This seat makes me nauseous:

[Found at IncredibleThings]
I could sit in it, but if I look at it too long I start to understand how M.C. Escher viewed the world.

Politics
* Furry underage panda sex isn't change we can believe in. This has nothing to do with Obama at all, but my friend said this and it makes me laugh every time, because I am judgmental and cruel. But the little boy was unharmed, so it's OK to laugh, right? Actually, it's kind of amazing that something as sinister as kids being cruised on the internet can be made funny by the idea of adults dressing up as sports team mascots. Makes you think, doesn't it?

Apocalypse How?
* Nuclear weapons? Yawn. Apparently we couldn't end the world with our nukes in the conventional sense, just fuck it up beyond belief. So we'd be alive, we'd just long for death every waking second of our miserable existence. I'm lying again. Every nuke in the world aimed at one place still couldn't do much damage. That being said, I'd appreciate it if we didn't TEST any of these theories. Just because it couldn't end the world, shooting off every nuke out there would kill an awful lot of people, and frankly my readership couldn't afford such a blow.

Doctor Who
* If you're a Doctor Who fan, you probably already know about the best website on the show, Outpost Gallifrey. And if you know about Outpost Gallifrey, you probably also know it is going to close down after 13 years. And if you know that, you're probably sad enough without my reminding you. If none of these apply to you, go watch Doctor Who, you damn neophyte.

WTF, INTERNET?
* The only thing I like about this weapon-baseball-cap is that it looks a lot like the hat Sylar wore in Season 1 of Heroes (which I may be reviewing today, since I finished my rewatch and I have many Deep Thoughts on the matter):

[Found at CrunchGear]
You rip off this hat and hit people with it. It's very strong. That's what it does. You take off your baseball cap and beat the shit out of someone with it while using the bill as a handle. First off, how stupid would you look if someone came upon you assaulting a would-be-attacker with a baseball cap? Second, if they decided to make these with sports logos, the murder rate in America so going to go through the roof. I'm just saying.

More later, because I am aggressively pretending tomorrow is just another day so I need to keep myself distracted because LALALALALALA I CAN'T HEAR YOU THERE AREN'T ANY LSATS TOMORROW STOP BREATHING MY AIR.
- LV

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