Blog* Title comes from Firefly. Inara has some serious issues with anything with a wobbly head.Books* This is what Wikipedia would be like if it wasn't online. It would take you twenty minutes just to find out the incorrect birthday of a fictional character from a cancelled TV show, not that I have ever done that:[Found at LikeCool]Have you hugged your internet today?People I Love* This guy is probably a terrible human being who enjoys torturing puppies and listens to Paris Hilton and, I don't know, kills flowers. But this is still pretty awesome, yes?[Found at FrigginRandom]Because nothing is cooler than saying, "I spent my vacation naked in a hot-tub, getting drunk and shooting shit.'Whedonverse* Here's Joss Whedon discussing his strong female characters. Meryl Streep introduces him, so you know he must be a force of pure good.Star Trek* Look, I have no problem ruining my hypothetical kids' lives with my fandom. My kids are going to be humiliated by their names and clothes and Rorschach My Little Ponies. It's going to be hilarious, for me. Not for them. I figure, hey, at least their therapy sessions will be interesting, right? The thing is, I kind of suspect that if I endorsed this particular geekery, my kids might not survive infancy:[Found at BoingBoing]That there is a Klingon baby cradle. There's a reason Klingon are so tough, you know. And while they may have some truly admirable qualities that humans should emulate (not me, team!Vulcan) you have to keep in mind that there's got to be a significant percentage of adorable Klingon babies that don't survive infancy, because their knife mobiles weren't attached securely enough. And human babies are soft and pink and weak. Think about it. Also, explaining the situation to the police could be unpleasant.TeeVee* Here's a list of TV stalkers. Totally called Doug Funnie. Anyone that into beets has some serious sexual and emotional issues.Journalism* Haha, this will either make you laugh or sob like a prison bitch, depending on how much you have invested on journalism not being a total joke. Watch this video of Fox Business failing to comprehend even the most basic of economic truths. Celebrity!Fail - New Category* As I've mentioned, I do not like Megan Fox. She irritates me terribly. I would like her to go elsewhere, and hopefully stop spouting bullshit and getting unattractive tattoos (Megan, my artist is fabulous. You want his number?) But I don't just hate Megan Fox, I hate all the demented and inexplicable lust surrounding her. All the attention (I appreciate the irony of blogging about this). Ultimately, I hate the fact that because of the internet, I know that Megan Fox has freak thumbs:[Found at WorldOfWonder]If I have to know this useless bullshit, so do you. Airtight logic.Geek Want* If I had an endless supply of money, I think that besides the comics and clothes and shoes and weaponry that I would accumulate, we'd all be surprised by the number of nifty salt and pepper shakers I'd have in my possession:[Found at NerdApproved]May I salt your steak with VIOLENCE? Or... salt?Daily Hot Guy[Hugh Laurie, from a scene in this awful TV show
, which I couldn't believe because WHO I ask you, would not have sex with Hugh Laurie? Answer: No one, which is why the show didn't do well. And yes, he's naked, and looks stricken]Politics* This could go under Journalism, but Fox News has gotten enough leniency with that category for one day, hasn't it? What would you ask the President, if given the chance? About the economy? Health care? Gay rights? International relations? Or, “IS IT TURE THAT YOU AND HAGATHA HAVE TO COME IN THE BACK DOOR OF THE WHITEHOUSE?” There are more, even worse, and like most things from Fox News, I can't decide whether to laugh at stupidity, or break down because people can be this awful and still escape Darwinism. I need a drink, and it's not even 10:00 AM.Apocalypse How?* You know what? All those people who say flying in airplanes is perfectly safe can screw right off. LIGHTNING KNOCKED OFF PART OF A PLANE. I DON'T CARE IF EVERYONE SURVIVED. THAT'S NOT THE POINT. Parts of my car don't FALL OFF and cause me to PLUMMET to my DEATH. Once Watchmen comes out, I'm never leaving the house again.WTF, INTERNET?* Oh, internet, the dizzying pleasures and sublime delights you offer me. As a girl, I may be offered bras that explode when I'm aroused, and things to hide my camel toe (rather than just wearing clothes that fit, but that's CRAZYTALK), but I will never have to deal with the knowledge that a product like this is marketed to me:[Found at NerdApproved]This is an exercise machine for men's junk. Yeah. Or, if you want to save money and be TRULY hardcore, you could do Cock Push-Ups like Tenacious D. Have a listen, mortals:Now, a guy says he follows the D's sexual philosophy, I'm in. In high school I identified as a Tenacious Deist. I'm not kidding. Plus, I seriously doubt the validity of Dr. Weener's medical license.Zombies* Reader Julie knows things, and sometimes she shares them with me, like THE GREATEST ZOMBIE MOVIE EVER IN THE HISTORY OF EVER OMFG WOODY HARRELSON KILLS EVERYTHING:WHY IS THIS NOT OUT NOW? WHY MUST I CONTINUE TO WAIT? I NEED TO LEARN THE WAYS OF WOODY. Plus his hat is win.And was that MIKE WHITE getting attacked on a toilet?!Animals* This made me think of Mitch Hedberg, one of my favorite comedians, and his insistence that a koala infestation would be wonderful, and then bemoaned the distance between himself and koalas. Koalas (LP Version) - Mitch HedbergA koala jumped into bed with some tourists. [Found at TimesOnline]They called a ranger to take it away. WHO DOES THAT? Mitch Hedberg wouldn't have done that. It's sunny out, and I have to go to work now. Warren Ellis heard of my sexy goat sacrifice and made the rains go, for a bit.- LV
, which I couldn't believe because WHO I ask you, would not have sex with Hugh Laurie? Answer: No one, which is why the show didn't do well. And yes, he's naked, and looks stricken]Politics* This could go under Journalism, but Fox News has gotten enough leniency with that category for one day, hasn't it? What would you ask the President, if given the chance? About the economy? Health care? Gay rights? International relations? Or, “IS IT TURE THAT YOU AND HAGATHA HAVE TO COME IN THE BACK DOOR OF THE WHITEHOUSE?” There are more, even worse, and like most things from Fox News, I can't decide whether to laugh at stupidity, or break down because people can be this awful and still escape Darwinism. I need a drink, and it's not even 10:00 AM.Apocalypse How?* You know what? All those people who say flying in airplanes is perfectly safe can screw right off. LIGHTNING KNOCKED OFF PART OF A PLANE. I DON'T CARE IF EVERYONE SURVIVED. THAT'S NOT THE POINT. Parts of my car don't FALL OFF and cause me to PLUMMET to my DEATH. Once Watchmen comes out, I'm never leaving the house again.WTF, INTERNET?* Oh, internet, the dizzying pleasures and sublime delights you offer me. As a girl, I may be offered bras that explode when I'm aroused, and things to hide my camel toe (rather than just wearing clothes that fit, but that's CRAZYTALK), but I will never have to deal with the knowledge that a product like this is marketed to me:[Found at NerdApproved]This is an exercise machine for men's junk. Yeah. Or, if you want to save money and be TRULY hardcore, you could do Cock Push-Ups like Tenacious D. Have a listen, mortals:Now, a guy says he follows the D's sexual philosophy, I'm in. In high school I identified as a Tenacious Deist. I'm not kidding. Plus, I seriously doubt the validity of Dr. Weener's medical license.Zombies* Reader Julie knows things, and sometimes she shares them with me, like THE GREATEST ZOMBIE MOVIE EVER IN THE HISTORY OF EVER OMFG WOODY HARRELSON KILLS EVERYTHING:WHY IS THIS NOT OUT NOW? WHY MUST I CONTINUE TO WAIT? I NEED TO LEARN THE WAYS OF WOODY. Plus his hat is win.And was that MIKE WHITE getting attacked on a toilet?!Animals* This made me think of Mitch Hedberg, one of my favorite comedians, and his insistence that a koala infestation would be wonderful, and then bemoaned the distance between himself and koalas. Koalas (LP Version) - Mitch HedbergA koala jumped into bed with some tourists. [Found at TimesOnline]They called a ranger to take it away. WHO DOES THAT? Mitch Hedberg wouldn't have done that. It's sunny out, and I have to go to work now. Warren Ellis heard of my sexy goat sacrifice and made the rains go, for a bit.- LV
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