Blog
* Title is from Arrested Development, courtesy of Steve Holt. I did my Senior Thesis on Film in a Post-9/11 World (fun, yes?). And I made my friends watch all sorts of depressing films about September 11th, bribing them with beer and food. My crazy roommate and her boyfriend joined us for United 93. At the very end of the film (which is excellent and well worth seeing, even if it is almost unbearably sad), during a particularly tense moment, my roommate's boyfriend jumped up and shouted "STEVE HOLT" at the top of his lungs, arms raised over his head, while the rest of us sat and cried. To this day, I still cannot tell if he was awesome or terrible. Maybe both.
Music
* File this under, 'Sweet, but really unnecessary':
[Found at LikeCool]
I am not a morning person. I have killed people - good people - for trying to talk to me before I've had at least three cups of coffee. Loud noises can cause me to level New Jersey with my rage. Flashing lights have resulted in hideous murders. I am not a morning person. And I don't want my mirror to do ANYTHING but reflect in the morning. At night, fine, that would be great as I brush my teeth. But when I'm stumbling blearily into the show, snarling at anyone foolish enough to make eye contact, a mirror playing ANY sort of music would result in said mirror ending up as a pile of shards, and me mumbling psychotically under my breath, "I TOLD you to shut up." And while I could always turn off the musical mirror, then it's just a mirror, and why would I pay so much money for that?
Technology
* My mom just spilled half a cup of coffee on her Mac. She is not pleasant. Maybe I should buy her this:
[Found at LikeCool]
It's a water-proof keyboard that you can roll up. But this invites all sort of questionable behavior. I am pretty dependent on my computer for entertainment and information, and it has all my writing after I transcribe it from notebooks (what? I'm old in my heart). And since it's a laptop, about the only place my computer DOESN'T travel with me is the bathroom and the pool. And the ocean. But soon I'll be Tweeting or IMing someone, and they will say something like, "I'm in a bath!" and it will be AWKWARD, because even if everyone else on the internet is naked right now (now I'm disturbed by that thought), at least they're not naked in a bathtub, squeezing a rubber ducky and WHO KNOWS what else. Also the keyboard might be waterproof, but the computer still isn't. So your last Tweet will be something like, "I'm going down the waterslide into the po-" And then you're dead.
Random Thought
* I am a very safe driver, and try to be respectful of bicyclists. But when you're riding a bike in the rain, talking on a cellphone, smoking a cigarette, AND holding a bottle of beer all while NOT wearing a helmet, isn't there a loophole that says I'm legally obligated to hit you? Then again, Mr. Multitasker was very amusing to watch. So I'm glad he lived. Just stay on the goddamn bike path next time.
Watchmen
* THIS IS HOW THE NEW FRONTIERSMAN IS BROADCASTING NOW. SATELLITE TV IS NOT DEAD, AND YOU ARE ALL COMMIES.
[Found at FrigginRandom]
I don't think this really has anything to do with Watchmen, except in the sense that everything in life does, and smiley faces have been eternally painted as sinister harbingers of death thanks to Alan Moore.
Tattoo Of Win
[Found at LOLTATZ]
Food
* It's cold, wet, and raining here in lovely NJ. I had a long day at work. Ergo, someone should be making me one of these:
[Found at SlashFood]
I know, my first thought was, 'What the fuck is that thing and why do I want to ingest it?' Turns out it's French Toast covered with spiced pears and syrupy goodness. Someone should be making this for me right now. And by 'someone,' I mean, 'Russell Brand or Zachary Quinto, or possibly both if one wants to work on the toast while the other deals with the pears, and that isn't a metaphor, I really want incredibly attractive men to make me this food, which I will then consume.'
Comics
* The next Astonishing X-Men (which I read sporadically) will be written by Warren Ellis. That is all the information you require. Oh, and it comes out June 24th. WARREN ELLIS IS GOD. (Well, one of them. You know my theory.)
Words Of Win
see more Fail Blog
Movies
* Boy, movies about the future sure are neat. But it's too bad when they give a specific DATE for their future vision. Because when it passes, and nothing like that happens, well you lose all credibility, don't you? But some are still to come, so we'll see who got it right. I'm still holding out hope for A Scanner Darkly's movieverse of drugs and smiles. That's how I choose to interpret it.
Stupid People
* Title is from Arrested Development, courtesy of Steve Holt. I did my Senior Thesis on Film in a Post-9/11 World (fun, yes?). And I made my friends watch all sorts of depressing films about September 11th, bribing them with beer and food. My crazy roommate and her boyfriend joined us for United 93. At the very end of the film (which is excellent and well worth seeing, even if it is almost unbearably sad), during a particularly tense moment, my roommate's boyfriend jumped up and shouted "STEVE HOLT" at the top of his lungs, arms raised over his head, while the rest of us sat and cried. To this day, I still cannot tell if he was awesome or terrible. Maybe both.
Music
* File this under, 'Sweet, but really unnecessary':
[Found at LikeCool]
I am not a morning person. I have killed people - good people - for trying to talk to me before I've had at least three cups of coffee. Loud noises can cause me to level New Jersey with my rage. Flashing lights have resulted in hideous murders. I am not a morning person. And I don't want my mirror to do ANYTHING but reflect in the morning. At night, fine, that would be great as I brush my teeth. But when I'm stumbling blearily into the show, snarling at anyone foolish enough to make eye contact, a mirror playing ANY sort of music would result in said mirror ending up as a pile of shards, and me mumbling psychotically under my breath, "I TOLD you to shut up." And while I could always turn off the musical mirror, then it's just a mirror, and why would I pay so much money for that?
Technology
* My mom just spilled half a cup of coffee on her Mac. She is not pleasant. Maybe I should buy her this:
[Found at LikeCool]
It's a water-proof keyboard that you can roll up. But this invites all sort of questionable behavior. I am pretty dependent on my computer for entertainment and information, and it has all my writing after I transcribe it from notebooks (what? I'm old in my heart). And since it's a laptop, about the only place my computer DOESN'T travel with me is the bathroom and the pool. And the ocean. But soon I'll be Tweeting or IMing someone, and they will say something like, "I'm in a bath!" and it will be AWKWARD, because even if everyone else on the internet is naked right now (now I'm disturbed by that thought), at least they're not naked in a bathtub, squeezing a rubber ducky and WHO KNOWS what else. Also the keyboard might be waterproof, but the computer still isn't. So your last Tweet will be something like, "I'm going down the waterslide into the po-" And then you're dead.
Random Thought
* I am a very safe driver, and try to be respectful of bicyclists. But when you're riding a bike in the rain, talking on a cellphone, smoking a cigarette, AND holding a bottle of beer all while NOT wearing a helmet, isn't there a loophole that says I'm legally obligated to hit you? Then again, Mr. Multitasker was very amusing to watch. So I'm glad he lived. Just stay on the goddamn bike path next time.
Watchmen
* THIS IS HOW THE NEW FRONTIERSMAN IS BROADCASTING NOW. SATELLITE TV IS NOT DEAD, AND YOU ARE ALL COMMIES.
[Found at FrigginRandom]
I don't think this really has anything to do with Watchmen, except in the sense that everything in life does, and smiley faces have been eternally painted as sinister harbingers of death thanks to Alan Moore.
Tattoo Of Win
[Found at LOLTATZ]
Food
* It's cold, wet, and raining here in lovely NJ. I had a long day at work. Ergo, someone should be making me one of these:
[Found at SlashFood]
I know, my first thought was, 'What the fuck is that thing and why do I want to ingest it?' Turns out it's French Toast covered with spiced pears and syrupy goodness. Someone should be making this for me right now. And by 'someone,' I mean, 'Russell Brand or Zachary Quinto, or possibly both if one wants to work on the toast while the other deals with the pears, and that isn't a metaphor, I really want incredibly attractive men to make me this food, which I will then consume.'
Comics
* The next Astonishing X-Men (which I read sporadically) will be written by Warren Ellis. That is all the information you require. Oh, and it comes out June 24th. WARREN ELLIS IS GOD. (Well, one of them. You know my theory.)
Words Of Win
see more Fail Blog
Movies
* Boy, movies about the future sure are neat. But it's too bad when they give a specific DATE for their future vision. Because when it passes, and nothing like that happens, well you lose all credibility, don't you? But some are still to come, so we'll see who got it right. I'm still holding out hope for A Scanner Darkly's movieverse of drugs and smiles. That's how I choose to interpret it.
Stupid People
"It turns out that calling police to brag about slashing the tires on four patrol cars isn't such a good idea."
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