Blog* I don't want your love. I just want your money. Title is from The Simpsons.Movie!Win* Chris Pine is going to be in a zombie movie. Yes, it looks like every other zombie movie, ever. And I have no problem with that. Stick with what works, I say. Also Chris Pine is very attractive, and if he wants to spend two hours running from zombies, I have nothing to say about that.Wow* This is either the best idea ever, or the worst. Or just genius. It's hard to say.
, only without their badassery. You are NOT Bea Arthur, although that would be sweet. I would not want to date a guy who found these appealing. They are disgusting. I hate them, and I will never, ever own one. With Blogger as my witness. There. I feel better now.Music* This is an interview, in a bathroom, with Courtney Love. I adored her as a teenager. I tried to bleach my hair (it turned orange, and most of it fell out). I tried to wear the kinderwhore look (since I'm 5'0" I just looked like a kid). I got a guitar and played 'Doll Parts' constantly (my parents still twitch when they hear that song). So yes, I think Ms. Love is a special sort of batshit insane, but I do think she's talented. Her Twitter is an insane, entertaining rambling experience, and she is unapologetically herself, and you know what? We need some crazy celebrities to keep shit interesting. Although I'm never bleaching my own hair again.Technology* Seriously, guys, I need these night vision goggles:[Found at CrunchGear]So here's the plan: one of you buy this game, Modern Warfare 2 (I am not a gamer, although I enjoy games). You buy the special, super-expensive edition. You give ME the night vision goggles, which I need to prepare for the zombie apocalypse, and also for general security purposes. Then you have a game, I have REAL night vision goggles, and everyone is happy. Good plan? Who's with me?Watchmen* Miss_Bushido sent me this GENIUS article about Rorschach, and why he is the most BAMF in the history of time and space. I think I need to live my life according to the chart on this website:[Found at Cracked]Wouldn't the world be better if everyone was a bit more like Rorschach? Actually, that would be sort of awful. So never mind. There's only one Rorschach, and he's played by Jackie Earle Haley and written by Alan Moore, and that is that. * This is seriously a genius tattoo design:And OMFG his NAME is symmetrical. LOOK AT IT. Apparently I have a fetish for symmetry. Who knew?*
pirates! Watchmen PIRATES!ARRRR, MATEY.Daily Hot Guy[Edward Norton, who is a brilliant actor who has been in such films as Primal Fear, Fight Club, The 25th Hour, The Painted Veil, and The People Vs. Larry Flynt, but who right now should totally ditch this career and join the hallowed category of 'Guys who can ROCK a white undershirt.' Plus he speaks Japanese, and he's super smart. Brains are very sexy.]Comics* Finally read the first volume of Y: The Last Man. Yes, I know, I am probably the last person to read it, because I suck, but I have a LOT of reading on my plate, OK? So shut up. Anyway, it was AMAZING, and I love it, and now I need to go buy the rest, with my imaginary money.* Continuing my reread of Transmetropolitan. I do want to live in that world. I can't imagine I'd do well, but I'd have fun until the inevitable fall. Plus I'd be a Spider Jerusalem groupie. Which would be fun, if supremely dangerous. I got so caught up in just enjoying the book that I didn't transcribe, so I'll go back and do that at some point this week, after the pile of other stuff shrinks. I really commit myself to too many projects. Because I like being busy, then I get insane, and then I can't work. It's a vicious cycle. Spider Jerusalem would understand. And I finally got good pictures of the bowel disruptor, thanks to Theresa and Erin, and their overall genius and computer skillz. So my shirt is going to be TWISTED.* On an unrelated note, there are some FUCKED UP Batman toys out there, yes? Look at this water pistol:[Found at ToplessRobot]I will not be squeezing it. Ever. The house is on fire? Too bad. Not touching that thing. Also he has a butt plug. Also the expression on his face is terrifying. There are more toys, here, and they are wrong in every possible way, and please make the bad men STOP.Russell Brand* First off, if everyone else thought Russell Brand was revolting, he'd HAVE to turn to me for solace. Second, I don't find any of these reported sexual acts particularly disturbing. I have a high threshold for the weird, or maybe men shagging glamour models in threesomes isn't that weird? Third, I think this whole thing was disproven, but either way, after you've had politicians in diapers and royalty saying they wish they were someone's tampon, this is practically prudish.Tattoo Of Win[Found at LOLTATZ]Words Of WIn[Found at Indexed]Hunter S. Thompson* A whole website about Hunter Thompson on film. Sometimes the internet is generous. And sometimes, when you google 'bowel disruptor,' it gives you UNSPEAKABLE HORROR. To be fair, I should have expected that.TwiHate* Russell Brand apparently inspires the hate of both Twilight fans AND Jonas Brothers fans, because he made fun of them or prevented them from sparkling. I don't know, I don't care. Calm the hell down, TwiHards. It will all be OK. Your movie is coming out on schedule, they're making a million more, the writer of your fandom has her OWN comic series. Everything is coming up roses for you. Pause and appreciate this. So Robert Pattinson didn't get to say one line. I'm sure he more than made up for it by sparkling and not bathing. It will all be OK, TwiHards. Honest.Politics* So it looks like we're all blaming Mark Sandford for everything, now. I must have missed that meeting. Really, I'm just amused by his tears and his bullshit, and think he should be in trouble for BUGGERING OFF for like a week and leaving his poor staff in a state of panic. But he is denying calling some other dude gay, which is clearly the WORST THING YOU CAN CALL ANYONE, EVAR, because really THAT is what we all care about in this day and age. Not the recession or the war or how Swine Flu is going to kill us all, and the survivors will have to live in The Stand, and with my luck I'll live through Swine Flu and then fall off a building. Unless Mark Sandford is weeping openly like a prison bitch on national TV about his forbidden love, I do not really care.Zombies* This is apparently the Sunday where categories are all flippy. I talked about zombies in Movie!Win, Russell Brand in TwiHate, Swine flu in politics, and now I'm talking about bacon in Zombies. But follow my logic, here:[Found at Geekologie]Canned bacon will be ESSENTIAL to the survival of the species come the zombie apocalypse. It lasts ten years, and it has tons of protein, and there's a gun on the can, so you KNOW it's all about survival. Of course, this doesn't bode well for the vegans and vegetarians, but when you're fighting for survival from flesh-eaters, the dietary restrictions of others aren't at the top of your list of concerns.That's all, really. I'm debating wearing my FREAKANGELS shirt to the comic store, to see if anyone notices, or if I get kidnapped and held hostage. It's a weird comic store. And I'm pretty sure the comic store with the cute guy is closed. Or maybe not. What's closed on Labor Day weekend?Busy, busy, busy, as Kurt Vonnegut used to say.- LV
Chinese workers have covered a giant steel bridge with butter because officials are fed up with traffic jams caused by people who slow down to watch suicide victims leaping to their death.And it works. That is the really wow-inducing part of the whole thing. It works. I salute you, Chinese workers who thought up this. So simple, and so effective. Does the bridge smell, I wonder? Rancid butter reeks.Nature* Nature is gross:[Found at UniqueDaily]That's a fungus, that is. Oozing red pus-like stuff. My mother thought it was a cupcake until I corrected her. She can no longer eat cupcakes.Girly Shit* Look, we as a culture need to get over onesies. They are never going to be attractive, and they are never going to be OK:[Found at NYMag]I know some people (usually tall, super-skinny supermodels) look OK in these. But that's not enough. They are AWFUL. You have to get naked to go pee. You run the risk of camel toe. You look like a chick from
, only without their badassery. You are NOT Bea Arthur, although that would be sweet. I would not want to date a guy who found these appealing. They are disgusting. I hate them, and I will never, ever own one. With Blogger as my witness. There. I feel better now.Music* This is an interview, in a bathroom, with Courtney Love. I adored her as a teenager. I tried to bleach my hair (it turned orange, and most of it fell out). I tried to wear the kinderwhore look (since I'm 5'0" I just looked like a kid). I got a guitar and played 'Doll Parts' constantly (my parents still twitch when they hear that song). So yes, I think Ms. Love is a special sort of batshit insane, but I do think she's talented. Her Twitter is an insane, entertaining rambling experience, and she is unapologetically herself, and you know what? We need some crazy celebrities to keep shit interesting. Although I'm never bleaching my own hair again.Technology* Seriously, guys, I need these night vision goggles:[Found at CrunchGear]So here's the plan: one of you buy this game, Modern Warfare 2 (I am not a gamer, although I enjoy games). You buy the special, super-expensive edition. You give ME the night vision goggles, which I need to prepare for the zombie apocalypse, and also for general security purposes. Then you have a game, I have REAL night vision goggles, and everyone is happy. Good plan? Who's with me?Watchmen* Miss_Bushido sent me this GENIUS article about Rorschach, and why he is the most BAMF in the history of time and space. I think I need to live my life according to the chart on this website:[Found at Cracked]Wouldn't the world be better if everyone was a bit more like Rorschach? Actually, that would be sort of awful. So never mind. There's only one Rorschach, and he's played by Jackie Earle Haley and written by Alan Moore, and that is that. * This is seriously a genius tattoo design:And OMFG his NAME is symmetrical. LOOK AT IT. Apparently I have a fetish for symmetry. Who knew?*
pirates! Watchmen PIRATES!ARRRR, MATEY.Daily Hot Guy[Edward Norton, who is a brilliant actor who has been in such films as Primal Fear, Fight Club, The 25th Hour, The Painted Veil, and The People Vs. Larry Flynt, but who right now should totally ditch this career and join the hallowed category of 'Guys who can ROCK a white undershirt.' Plus he speaks Japanese, and he's super smart. Brains are very sexy.]Comics* Finally read the first volume of Y: The Last Man. Yes, I know, I am probably the last person to read it, because I suck, but I have a LOT of reading on my plate, OK? So shut up. Anyway, it was AMAZING, and I love it, and now I need to go buy the rest, with my imaginary money.* Continuing my reread of Transmetropolitan. I do want to live in that world. I can't imagine I'd do well, but I'd have fun until the inevitable fall. Plus I'd be a Spider Jerusalem groupie. Which would be fun, if supremely dangerous. I got so caught up in just enjoying the book that I didn't transcribe, so I'll go back and do that at some point this week, after the pile of other stuff shrinks. I really commit myself to too many projects. Because I like being busy, then I get insane, and then I can't work. It's a vicious cycle. Spider Jerusalem would understand. And I finally got good pictures of the bowel disruptor, thanks to Theresa and Erin, and their overall genius and computer skillz. So my shirt is going to be TWISTED.* On an unrelated note, there are some FUCKED UP Batman toys out there, yes? Look at this water pistol:[Found at ToplessRobot]I will not be squeezing it. Ever. The house is on fire? Too bad. Not touching that thing. Also he has a butt plug. Also the expression on his face is terrifying. There are more toys, here, and they are wrong in every possible way, and please make the bad men STOP.Russell Brand* First off, if everyone else thought Russell Brand was revolting, he'd HAVE to turn to me for solace. Second, I don't find any of these reported sexual acts particularly disturbing. I have a high threshold for the weird, or maybe men shagging glamour models in threesomes isn't that weird? Third, I think this whole thing was disproven, but either way, after you've had politicians in diapers and royalty saying they wish they were someone's tampon, this is practically prudish.Tattoo Of Win[Found at LOLTATZ]Words Of WIn[Found at Indexed]Hunter S. Thompson* A whole website about Hunter Thompson on film. Sometimes the internet is generous. And sometimes, when you google 'bowel disruptor,' it gives you UNSPEAKABLE HORROR. To be fair, I should have expected that.TwiHate* Russell Brand apparently inspires the hate of both Twilight fans AND Jonas Brothers fans, because he made fun of them or prevented them from sparkling. I don't know, I don't care. Calm the hell down, TwiHards. It will all be OK. Your movie is coming out on schedule, they're making a million more, the writer of your fandom has her OWN comic series. Everything is coming up roses for you. Pause and appreciate this. So Robert Pattinson didn't get to say one line. I'm sure he more than made up for it by sparkling and not bathing. It will all be OK, TwiHards. Honest.Politics* So it looks like we're all blaming Mark Sandford for everything, now. I must have missed that meeting. Really, I'm just amused by his tears and his bullshit, and think he should be in trouble for BUGGERING OFF for like a week and leaving his poor staff in a state of panic. But he is denying calling some other dude gay, which is clearly the WORST THING YOU CAN CALL ANYONE, EVAR, because really THAT is what we all care about in this day and age. Not the recession or the war or how Swine Flu is going to kill us all, and the survivors will have to live in The Stand, and with my luck I'll live through Swine Flu and then fall off a building. Unless Mark Sandford is weeping openly like a prison bitch on national TV about his forbidden love, I do not really care.Zombies* This is apparently the Sunday where categories are all flippy. I talked about zombies in Movie!Win, Russell Brand in TwiHate, Swine flu in politics, and now I'm talking about bacon in Zombies. But follow my logic, here:[Found at Geekologie]Canned bacon will be ESSENTIAL to the survival of the species come the zombie apocalypse. It lasts ten years, and it has tons of protein, and there's a gun on the can, so you KNOW it's all about survival. Of course, this doesn't bode well for the vegans and vegetarians, but when you're fighting for survival from flesh-eaters, the dietary restrictions of others aren't at the top of your list of concerns.That's all, really. I'm debating wearing my FREAKANGELS shirt to the comic store, to see if anyone notices, or if I get kidnapped and held hostage. It's a weird comic store. And I'm pretty sure the comic store with the cute guy is closed. Or maybe not. What's closed on Labor Day weekend?Busy, busy, busy, as Kurt Vonnegut used to say.- LV
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