One-Line Reviews

Note: Originally published on my old blog August 27, 2008.The challenge: review things with one line only. This is actually harder than it may seem.* THE DARK KNIGHT - Yes, it really is that good.* STAR WARS: THE CLONE WARS - Like receiving thousands of tiny paper cuts over a period of nearly two hours.* TROPIC THUNDER - Shockingly funny, but I'm really hoping that they actually make SATAN'S ALLEY.* TWILIGHT by Stephenie Meyer - Angsty teenage vampire melodrama, but compulsively readable in a really shameful way.* BEAUTY & THE BEAST: SEASON ONE - Katherine gets captured, Vincent saves the day, and the bitch STILL won't even kiss him.* IRON MAN - Everything a good comic movie should be, and then some.* HELLBOY II: THE GOLDEN ARMY - Any movie that has supernatural superheroes sitting around drunk singing Barry Manilow deserves an Oscar for something. * THE INCREDIBLE HULK - Should have been better, but then will come THE AVENGERS movie, and all shall be well - if they replace Jessica Alba, that is. * VIRICONIUM by M. John Harrison - Beautifully written, although I'd be lying if I said I 'got' it.* STAR WARS: REVENGE OF THE SITH - Complete rubbish, except for Ewan McGregor's Alec Guinness-channeling performance as Obi Wan Kenobi. * THE I.T. CROWD - Be sure to bring a fresh pair of pants. * DOCTOR WHO - The greatest idea ever in the history of the known universe (totally stolen from Russell T. Davies, but that doesn't make it any less true).

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