Thursday, September 24, 2009

Your Resentment Is Delicious.

Blog
* Title is from Glee, the best show ever on Wednesday to include dancing football players.

* This is like the saddest example of bad posture ever:

[Drawn by Erin]
This could be an alien species, and the Doctor has to teach them about standing up straight for their self-esteem.

What? I'm still sick.

* Megan, your Poopy-Time Fun-Shapes beat out almost everything I have ever written about on this blog. But I have to say, I'm kind of grateful you're the one who had to deal with it, instead of me. Because... well... they're disgusting. And they scare me. Now go watch The IT Crowd and try to forget this trauma.

* Theresa tells me about X-Men. If I need to know anything about comics, I ask Theresa. If I need to know anything about musicals, I ask Theresa. She is a geyser of information. And I know this was for Mutant Monday, but you know what? I am SICK, dammit, and keep sneezing and coughing and you should all be sympathetic, and like fine wine Theresa's blog posts only IMPROVE with age. TRUFAX.

WTF, INTERNET?
* I think we can all agree that the girl who made this is incredibly talented. I knit scarves. That shit is not easy, and my scarves always end up looking sort of sad. Still, sad-looking scarves are not QUITE on the same level as a knitted lab rat dissection:

[Found at Neatorama]
It's very well-done. I just don't know why anyone would ever want this. I have never looked at my pet rats and thought, 'They'd be so much better, only made out of felt and sliced the hell up.' And knitting that must have been a sincere experience.
But I have to admit, I am filled with a strange urge to PET the felt organs. I'm going to blame this on the illness.

Life Lessons
* Guys, we girls like it when you're polite and chivalrous (OK, I could write a whole thing on my attraction to mean geniuses, but I also dearly love Ianto Jones, so I figure this applies). But I have never heard of a guy accompanying me to the bathroom. Either I am dating real assholes (always possible) or that is just about the creepiest thing ever. I don't need you to take me to the bathroom. I also would consider it a deal-breaker if you unironically called going to the bathroom 'taking a tinkle.' Yes, I know what happens in the lavatory. Here's a list of other creepy things guys do. Just some suggestions, boys.
But I will argue about the 'helping me with my coat.' I think it's charming. Especially when it's done by a Welsh coffee boy turned badass agent, who rocks the hell out of a suit. Sorry, my brain went away there for a moment. Point is, if you don't make the coat-help awkward, it won't be. Like most things in life.

Music
* Have I posted this before? I can't remember. I have some hideous disease. But danceswithelvis sent me this, and it's Kermit singing 'Hurt' by Nine Inch Nails, and I know it's not REALLY Kermit, but it still manages to freak me out and sadden me ALMOST as much as Johnny Cash's version:

PUT DOWN THE NEEDLE, KERMIT. PLEASE. BEAKER WILL BE SO UPSET.

Technology
* It's funny, I thought my internet went down while I was writing this. So it's appropriate, really, to determine my internet dependency by rating my reaction when the internet goes down. According to this, I'm at Stage 3 Internet Dependency:
Stage 3 Internet Dependency

Immediate reaction: Try the neighbor’s wi-fi trick, making a few guesses at the passwords of their locked-down networks.

What you do while waiting for the connection to come back: Try connecting again. And again. Try to watch a film, remember you only watch films that stream online, go back to your computer and try to connect again.

If it doesn’t come back in an hour: Call your service provider, then pack up your laptop and head for an internet cafe.



My friend, who shall remain nameless, is closer to Stage 10. He hacked into the building's Wi-Fi, and was feeding off of his landlord's private Wi-Fi connection, and was so pissed he encoded the whole thing so that when the internet came back ON in the building, no one else could use it.

Heroes
* Best poster for a TV show ever:

I'll be in my bunk. Forever.

Daily Hot Guy
* I have arbitrarily decided to have more reader involvement in this category, because I am generous and have some sort of sinus infection-swine-flu hybrid that I just invented. So, yeah. I'm taking reader requests on Daily Hot Guy:

[James Marsters, AKA Spike from Buffy The Vampire Slayer and Angel: The Series, AKA Captain John from Torchwood, who can sing, and well, and continues to be very sexy, and has survived the BtVS fallout (as I call it) and still has a career. He should have been nicer to Ianto though. Just saying. Requested by sheepterror, who understands my love for Ianto Jones.]

OK, I am running super late for work, and I am sick (I will continue to mention this until I get better, or get fabulous presents to make up for my illness), but I WILL post throughout the day, and entertain you ALL, because I am just like that.
- LV

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