Life
* There's not a lot going on in the wide world of the internets today, because it's some religious holiday weekend, which means everyone is off getting drunk and fornicating like godless sinners. Which I approve of, usually, although it would be nice to have more things to report on.
* Vote in my survey, people. I NEED INPUT. Do you like the new categories? WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME? And could you promote my blog? Because I am not doing too well with the promoting, and I feel dirty like an old whore when I'm running around begging people to read this thing. That is not a nice feeling. So you guys can do it, for a change.
Random
* This website is made up entirely of sandwiches being cut in half and scanned into the computer. I have no idea where the idea for this came from, but I'm torn between finding it idiotic and completely brilliant. On one hand, this guy is SCANNING sandwiches. He is cutting them in half and scanning them, and we are all looking at them. It's weird, but it's also really cool. You can see the inside of the sandwiches. And many of them look delicious. You see my dilemma. I need to understand. Where did this idea come from? What IS this? And why are more people interested in scans of sandwiches then my blog? (Answer: Sandwiches are delicious.)
* Another thing I fail to understand is Urban Camo. This reminds me of the time, freshman year in college, when one of my roommates and her boyfriend took the ladder from her loft bed, put it over their heads, and walked around the block with no shoes on. In New York. And when people asked them WHY they had a ladder on their heads and no shoes on their feet, on ground where people do awful, awful things, she would answer 'Why DON'T you have a ladder on your head?" Because, you see, she was a liberal arts student, and an ARTIST, and misunderstood, etc. And I was a liberal arts student, too. But I never felt the need to run around the street with furniture on my head in some desperate, sad attempt to show what an individual I am.
[Found at Geekologie]
Point is, these people make me think of her. Once again, like the scanned sandwiches, I do not understand. It's cool, but... why? Just because? OK. But unlike the sandwich scanning, which seems harmless and charming, this seems ominously like a 'statement' of some sort. Also, I could never love anyone who did this. I'm just saying.
* Apparently, this blog is becoming cake-focused. If so, that's fine. Cake is incredible. When done right, it's moist and delicious and sweet, and all that is good in this world. Plus, this isn't some regular cake. This is a frigging RAINBOW cake. If Rainbow Brite and the Care-Bears had joined forces, this is what they would have supped on whilst celebrating the defeat of their ruthless foes. That is how freaking great this cake is.
[Found at Geekologie]
Or hippies. Hippies would like this cake too. They'd probably add a 'magical ingredient' though, if you know what I mean, wink wink nudge nudge. I dislike hippies. But check out the link, because it gives you instructions on making this glorious piece of pastry, and then YOU can be like the Care Bears and Rainbow Brite, which is really everyone's secret desire in life.
Politics
* So, another dead dude is running a town. In Missouri, this time. Soon, all our small towns will be run by dead people or fictional characters (I'm sure those Twilight kids are already planning a Mayor Bella campaign that will send me into paroxysm of dementia), and it will make no difference in America, because apparently we're all going to be Socialist soon, or nuked. So I'm going to be voting for Mayor Darkwing Duck. At least I won't be throwing my vote away.
News
* In Orange County, California, I just witnessed the greatest car chase ever. In large part because no one was hurt, so I can enjoy it without being a horrible, horrible person. I can't find any news coverage, for some reason, but MSNBC has been following it very diligently, so I got to see the full footage. This woman is awesome. Probably out of her mind, but during the course of this chase, she:
- Drove into the median and spun circles while the cops chased her
- Got struck by a cop car and kept going
- Changed directions
- Got out of the CAR TO FLIP OFF THE COPS. The car started rolling away, and she DOVE BACK IN AND DROVE OFF AGAIN.
Seriously, who needs Fast and the Furious? This shit is FREE, and REAL, and far cooler.
WTF, INTERNET?
* Bacon-flavored lube. Wasn't there some Seinfeld episode about how sex, TV, and meat products would be the best experience ever? I don't know, I disliked that show. But once again, I find myself conflicted. I mean, if people get really, you know, EXCITED about the concept of bacon-flavored sexings, who am I to judge? Enjoy your bacon-dipped body parts. However, I'm unsure of how people can react in this situation. If your lover asks you to douse your unmentionables in bacon-flavored fluids, what do you say? Is there ANY way a relationship can survive someone refusing that offer? What if you just suggest chucking uncooked baking at each other in the bedroom? What if you're - gasp - a VEGAN? Then again, if you're partner's willing to compromise, maybe they'll settle for the Bacon-Flavored Lip Balm. I love bacon, but I don't really want to be ASSOCIATED with it. You know what I mean? I don't want to pass people on the street, and for them to point, and whisper, 'There goes the BACON LADY.' That is not the image I am aspiring to.
I had more stuff to write, but my mom is screaming about, I don't know, how unfair her poor life is, or something else. I'm not listening. This is why you should always move out, when you can. Always. Living at home in your twenties is like the seventh circle of HELL. I do not suggest it. I don't usually write about my family, because it's boring and personal, but JESUS CHRIST. Stupid economy, forcing me to live at home and not even have a car in which to FLEE.
Is it still running away from home if you're in your twenties? This is something I need to know.
- LV
PS Survey, blah blah blah, if you want. I don't care. Now I'm all sad.
PPSS Title ripped off from this website. They'll be suing me any day now.
PPPSSS A whole entry without mentioning Watchmen. I think I've really matured as a human being.
* There's not a lot going on in the wide world of the internets today, because it's some religious holiday weekend, which means everyone is off getting drunk and fornicating like godless sinners. Which I approve of, usually, although it would be nice to have more things to report on.
* Vote in my survey, people. I NEED INPUT. Do you like the new categories? WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME? And could you promote my blog? Because I am not doing too well with the promoting, and I feel dirty like an old whore when I'm running around begging people to read this thing. That is not a nice feeling. So you guys can do it, for a change.
Random
* This website is made up entirely of sandwiches being cut in half and scanned into the computer. I have no idea where the idea for this came from, but I'm torn between finding it idiotic and completely brilliant. On one hand, this guy is SCANNING sandwiches. He is cutting them in half and scanning them, and we are all looking at them. It's weird, but it's also really cool. You can see the inside of the sandwiches. And many of them look delicious. You see my dilemma. I need to understand. Where did this idea come from? What IS this? And why are more people interested in scans of sandwiches then my blog? (Answer: Sandwiches are delicious.)
* Another thing I fail to understand is Urban Camo. This reminds me of the time, freshman year in college, when one of my roommates and her boyfriend took the ladder from her loft bed, put it over their heads, and walked around the block with no shoes on. In New York. And when people asked them WHY they had a ladder on their heads and no shoes on their feet, on ground where people do awful, awful things, she would answer 'Why DON'T you have a ladder on your head?" Because, you see, she was a liberal arts student, and an ARTIST, and misunderstood, etc. And I was a liberal arts student, too. But I never felt the need to run around the street with furniture on my head in some desperate, sad attempt to show what an individual I am.
[Found at Geekologie]
Point is, these people make me think of her. Once again, like the scanned sandwiches, I do not understand. It's cool, but... why? Just because? OK. But unlike the sandwich scanning, which seems harmless and charming, this seems ominously like a 'statement' of some sort. Also, I could never love anyone who did this. I'm just saying.
* Apparently, this blog is becoming cake-focused. If so, that's fine. Cake is incredible. When done right, it's moist and delicious and sweet, and all that is good in this world. Plus, this isn't some regular cake. This is a frigging RAINBOW cake. If Rainbow Brite and the Care-Bears had joined forces, this is what they would have supped on whilst celebrating the defeat of their ruthless foes. That is how freaking great this cake is.
[Found at Geekologie]
Or hippies. Hippies would like this cake too. They'd probably add a 'magical ingredient' though, if you know what I mean, wink wink nudge nudge. I dislike hippies. But check out the link, because it gives you instructions on making this glorious piece of pastry, and then YOU can be like the Care Bears and Rainbow Brite, which is really everyone's secret desire in life.
Politics
* So, another dead dude is running a town. In Missouri, this time. Soon, all our small towns will be run by dead people or fictional characters (I'm sure those Twilight kids are already planning a Mayor Bella campaign that will send me into paroxysm of dementia), and it will make no difference in America, because apparently we're all going to be Socialist soon, or nuked. So I'm going to be voting for Mayor Darkwing Duck. At least I won't be throwing my vote away.
News
* In Orange County, California, I just witnessed the greatest car chase ever. In large part because no one was hurt, so I can enjoy it without being a horrible, horrible person. I can't find any news coverage, for some reason, but MSNBC has been following it very diligently, so I got to see the full footage. This woman is awesome. Probably out of her mind, but during the course of this chase, she:
- Drove into the median and spun circles while the cops chased her
- Got struck by a cop car and kept going
- Changed directions
- Got out of the CAR TO FLIP OFF THE COPS. The car started rolling away, and she DOVE BACK IN AND DROVE OFF AGAIN.
Seriously, who needs Fast and the Furious? This shit is FREE, and REAL, and far cooler.
WTF, INTERNET?
* Bacon-flavored lube. Wasn't there some Seinfeld episode about how sex, TV, and meat products would be the best experience ever? I don't know, I disliked that show. But once again, I find myself conflicted. I mean, if people get really, you know, EXCITED about the concept of bacon-flavored sexings, who am I to judge? Enjoy your bacon-dipped body parts. However, I'm unsure of how people can react in this situation. If your lover asks you to douse your unmentionables in bacon-flavored fluids, what do you say? Is there ANY way a relationship can survive someone refusing that offer? What if you just suggest chucking uncooked baking at each other in the bedroom? What if you're - gasp - a VEGAN? Then again, if you're partner's willing to compromise, maybe they'll settle for the Bacon-Flavored Lip Balm. I love bacon, but I don't really want to be ASSOCIATED with it. You know what I mean? I don't want to pass people on the street, and for them to point, and whisper, 'There goes the BACON LADY.' That is not the image I am aspiring to.
I had more stuff to write, but my mom is screaming about, I don't know, how unfair her poor life is, or something else. I'm not listening. This is why you should always move out, when you can. Always. Living at home in your twenties is like the seventh circle of HELL. I do not suggest it. I don't usually write about my family, because it's boring and personal, but JESUS CHRIST. Stupid economy, forcing me to live at home and not even have a car in which to FLEE.
Is it still running away from home if you're in your twenties? This is something I need to know.
- LV
PS Survey, blah blah blah, if you want. I don't care. Now I'm all sad.
PPSS Title ripped off from this website. They'll be suing me any day now.
PPPSSS A whole entry without mentioning Watchmen. I think I've really matured as a human being.
0 comments:
Post a Comment